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I'm 6/7 months into this caregiving for my mom & FULLTIME since Covid-19. I can't even imagine going into years doing this especially (tele)working 10 hour days, but can't imagine putting my mom into a NH. I have to work 4.5 more years and I know her dementia/Alz will get worse & not better. I can say I am definitely grateful that she can still toilet herself & feed herself. I got her a, then puppy, last year, but she just adds to my burden because of my mom's condition but she is a good companion for mom but again, more responsibility for me. I try to look on the positive side of things especially when reading most articles in this forum but it doesn't totally alleviate the stress of caring for mom, home, dog & my own personal stuff. I feel I'm neglecting caring & seeing my grandkids because of exhaustion caring for mom & the fear of one of them bringing C-19 into the home. My work week starts at 6:30 & doesn't end until 10-10:30. I have a camera in her room & constantly find myself checking on her. There are 15 steps to go upstairs & I have feet issues, plantar fasciitis & heel spurs, so the pain from that just adds to my stress. Would like for mom to come down but then she is constantly getting into or doing things that causes me to have to stop what I'm doing to tend to her and or the dog.
So respite care would be GREAT, but reality is, how to get it & get it safely!

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FFlorida, that may be true. I saw the question as more asking about the long haul of how to manage until she retires in 4.5 years. I hope the OP comes back!
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Why can't you imagine your mother in a good Assisted Living Center?
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FloridaDD Jun 2020
Maybe I interpreted her question wrong, but I thought it was in the Corona era, how can she investigate places.
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Can you call an agency and get someone to come in for a few hours a day?
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Bunny, you have a great question, one that is probably shared by others. Have you checked into an adult day care center for your mother? Or perhaps a social services program can give you guidance. You have been an angel for your Mom, but deserve to take care of yourself too.
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