Thinking about taking mom on family vacation but she will need in-room attendance. Can this be arranged?

Just curious - wouldn't it be better to hire people to come into the home to care for her while you're gone? At least she'd still be in familiar surroundings.

The trip, being left alone in the room, not being included in family activities (that's a blow in and of itself)...it's just too much for someone even w/o dementia. Is there a specific reason why you want to take her if she won't be involved with family? Is it a care issue for leaving her at home?

If you do hire temporary caregivers and let her remain at home, start researching early so you can find good ones you can trust. Or perhaps investigate a short respite care at a facility; at least she'd have 24/7 assistance available.

This does not sound like a good idea at all. People with dementia do not respond to changes in location very well and I don't think you are going to find a CNA to provide service in a hotel room.

I hate to be a wet blanket, but someone is going to have to be unselfish and not join in with the activities that aren't suitable for your mother. Or find other activities that she can join in.

A new caregiver on top of two new locations is too much for your mother, even assuming you can find a trustworthy service to provide one; and besides it's not like hiring a sitter for a sleeping baby.

As a courtesy to the hotel, you'd better ask if they can provide waterproof mattress protectors. If not, take your own; and if you don't want to cart them around with you then just leave them behind with the hotel bedlinen.

That does sound like a lot of travel for an elderly lady, too. What mode of transport are you using?

Unless your mom is in the earliest stages, this is not a good idea. When my mom was in the early stages, we took her on a few trips. We were going to family homes. We also were with her at all times. It took lots of planning and flexibility to make it work.

I agree if you can't include her in all your activities, then you either have to change what you are doing or leave her at home with a caregiver or in respite care. My mom moved in with us about 5 months ago. We left her overnight once, and then my sister came up to stay with her. We're planning another overnight at my son's house, but I can't see Mom doing that. When she moved in with us, she was very confused. She gets a bit confused when people stay with us. She starts hiding things again. I have a caregiver who is willing to spend the night with her, so in September we're going to try that. It's just for one night. I'm working up to a real vacation in the winter where someone will have to stay with her for a week. We all need a break, so I would think that leaving Mom at home might be the best solution for your family.

The best solution I think is to contact a Memory Care facility near you and ask if you can place her for Respite.
She will probably need a TB skin test or chest X-ray and a Doctors note stating that she is in good health.
She will be "on vacation" and you and your family can enjoy your vacation as well.
I placed my Husband for Respite and I must tell you I did worry that I would not be able to bring him home after several weeks of "institutional" living but he adjusted to the facility quite well and getting him home was no problem at all.
The facility will contact you if there are any problems.
You can have friends stop in and check on her as well.
This will also give you a break from care giving and that is what you need and what the family needs.
Your Mom may not like it at first but she would not do well with the travel as well as nights in a different hotel room.


If you insist and truly feel that you need to take her do a search for Agencies that will come in and watch her. If she has no health problems you may just need a "companion" if she needs to be changed or fed you may have to get someone else that is qualified. It depends on the regulations that the particular agency follows.
You will probably still need the medical note stating that she is in good health as well as the TB skin test. 

I appreciate everyone's input and will duly re-consider. 85% of the time, Mom is fully alert, reasonably social, and physically functional on a slower level. On day trips with limited walking, no problem. Family trip inclusive of two teenagers. She would not be able to handle extensive walking-around in congested areas and we would not want to
have her involved in a 3-4 hour long outdoor ferry tour hence my inquiry regarding an In-room Care Giver attendance. I plan on calling a few Home Care Services for a opinion before making a final decision.

I decided not to go on the trip. I truly think it would be hard on my husband. I also don't want to spoil my son's family's vacation. They have said they want us along but defer to my judgement. I don't regret my decision in any way or even feel sorry for myself. My husband is relatively happy at home and I don't want to rock the boat and risk him being agitated on the trip or worse, have a set back. I'm sure this is the best decision for me and my husband.

FamilyGuy - I took my mother to Rehoboth Beach, DE, and I stayed in the room with her and watched her for a weekend. I was really glad that I did, as any time she woke up and was confused, I was there. It was not the "family vacation" that some might want, but it was good for her. If you really have a family vacation with a lot of travel, I would suggest that you find a respite care service for her to stay for those three nights, and when you want to take Mom away, make it a simpler, more controlled weekend.

Patience is the key to everything