Taking care of my mother who is dying. I just don't know what to do.

I'm a woman of faith, so I pray. It's been 4 months since I lost Dad and 16 years since I lost Mom. Sometimes I have just a few seconds when I forget ...I'll see something I want to buy for them or tell them about, and years ago I even picked up the phone once or twice to call Mom. For me, those are blessings, reminders that I was so very fortunate to have them at all.

((((((hugs)))) Such profound losses. Grief counselling might help you. Do you have a therapist? I have found that when dealing with deep losses I sometimes have to do it one minute, one hour, one day at a time. Some people find that distractions help for a while e.g.- music, or whatever appeals to you. Speaking with someone - a therapist, pastor, friends about your feelings may help. The 4 T's of grief are -Time, Talk, Tears, Toil (the work of grieving as you might do in therapy or a group.) Time only helps if you do the other 3. Hugs from friends and trusting in yourself and your ability to progress through this are also good. It is important at this time to look after yourself -eat properly, get enough sleep, keep hydrated, get some exercise.
One foot in front of the other - you can get through this, though I understand that that seems very difficult right now.

Thank you so much. As I sit here in my living room watching my mother sleep. Every gasp for air rips at my heart. It's often difficult to sleep because I'm popping up every 15 minutes to make sure she is still with me.

As someone who may very well be in your position very soon, my heart really aches for you. I guess the sad part is there are no real answers - life is very painful at times. I have not met you, don't know you, and I don't know if you are a person of faith or not (not judging if you are not) but I will be praying for you tonight as I go to sleep.

Yes, I am a person of faith. Thank you so much. Prayers are needed. I will be praying for you as well!

Hi Christina
One of the things I would have given anything for was to have read the book titled
The Five Invitations by Frank Ostaseski. I do not understand why we are not told the things in this book. It would have made my time with my mother so very different in only positive ways & would have imensely helped me not have the powerless feelings I had.
Blessings