Would a suspected sedative be considered a valid reason to remove my Dad from senior home and to refuse to pay the 30 day rent?

Well based on the additional information, it's possible your dad was given a sedative, but it's also very possible your dad's slurred speech and sleeping was caused by his general decline and/or the medications he's on. It could be from his sugar being out of whack.

If I wake my mom from a sound sleep (during the day), she sounds drunk, with slurred speech. I can tell she's been sleeping. She's had periods of sleeping a lot, unrelated to being given a sedative. My mom also has no short-term memory, so she'll say she hasn't been told something when I know she's been told multiple times, because I'm the one who's told her. So what seniors report and what reality is can be two very different things. Not intentionally on their part, but because their brains aren't working right.

If your dad has mild cognitive decline, you need to observe him very closely, because those symptoms can come and go from day to day or even hour to hour. So did the home give him a sedative? Possibly. But I think there's a strong possibility that your dad simply had a bad day and that's what happened. It sounds like it's time to really read about the meds he's on (side effects) and get a good handle on what his mild cognitive impairment looks like from day-to-day.

Track that contract down and see what it says about leaving without 30 days notice. While you may feel justified in not paying rent you don't want to get your dad into legal trouble either.

If you have proof.....real proof....of wrongdoing contact a lawyer before you decide to just not pay the rent.

My mother, when her diagnosis was mci, used to claim all sorts of bizarre things about her caregivers. Any time she had loose stools, it was because " they gave me something".

You should get him to his doctor and report his symptoms; slurring, reporting that he slept for two days. You might want to check with the board and care home about what they objectively observed about your dad5symptoms while he was there. Do they alert families if patients are behaving oddly?

If yyour dad is going to be cared for in a facility, family has to develop a trusting relationship with the caregivers, and the caregivers need to know when to call and report a problem. I don't know if it's worthwhile to try to backtrack and see if this can actually be a good setting for dad. Where is he being cared for now? Is that working?

Sorry this suggestion is a bit late since you've already given notice, but you could send an amended notice.

Be sure to follow the termination conditions, such as giving notice by certified mail, hand delivered, or whatever is specified. If the terms and conditions aren't followed ver batim, the facility might claim it didn't have proper notice in compliance with the contract and attempt to continue charging you.

If you decide to send an amended notice, and if you're required to specify a reason, you might consider something more general like "inadequate care", which is more broad and could include more than the suspected administration of a sedative.

The staff member who tried to prevent your brother from access to your father's things could fall in a category of "inadequately trained staff", or "belligerent staff", but you want to be careful about making those accusations because it's a "he said, he said" situation.

However, if he threatened your brother, that raises the issue from uncooperative to confrontational. But the issue is proof, unless your brother recorded the incident.

The more general reasons for leaving also give you latitude if you do discover after the next doctor's appointment that something was amiss when your father's behavior changed.

In addition, because it's more general, it could be more damaging to the facility than administration of a sedative which would be hard to prove unless the residue of it remains in a person's system for sometime after administration.

Whatever they're threatening, they certainly don't want bad publicity, so you can also hold that consideration in abeyance if they create further problems.

I would follow up to find out as much about what happened as possible. Since your dad has been diagnosed with MCD, I would be diligent in observing how he could be progressing.

Often, the story from the patient may not be accurate. They don't mean to tell false stories, but they say what they believe, and it may be wrong. My cousin thought that her doctor slept on a couch the lobby of her Memory Care facility. She also reported residents who had no legs walked. So, it's a good idea to investigate and confirm. Your dad could eventually say something about you that is not true. I'd be prepared for that.

In your profile, you say the Senior Advisor recommended the home for your dad. If there was reason for that, then wouldn't he still be in need of that care? I'd be wary of just assuming that checking on him while he lives alone is adequate.

Of course, if your dad was treated improperly, it should be addressed. There should be a log completed by the Med Tech as to what medication your father was given.

Being as your Dad is Diabetic, is the staff monitoring his blood sugars? Have his BS levels been consistent and in the normal levels? Why ever didn't the caregivers contact the family if he wasn't acting normal, or sleeping excessively? Aren't they required to notify family if something is amiss in his routine? Could it be that your Dad was simply unhappy with his living situation, and fibbing to get attention? Is your Dad prescribed any medication that is sedating, and could these medications have been accidentally mixed up, and /or, not given at the correct time? The Diabetes is IMO, the likely suspect. Low BS levels, can really knock a pers6out, and cause the groggy symptoms you are describing. But being that he was so unhappy there, and that you already have him back in his home, he is going to need extra extra supervision to monitor his behaviors going forward. Is there going to be someone available to him 24/7, as at 85, with cognitive issues, diabetes, and the fact that he takes a lot of medicine, puts him at serious risk, for being alone, even though he is happier being there. I think one months rent, is probably the least of your worries at this point! Is he able to manage taking his medicine and monitoring his BS on his own, or will there be someone with him daily, looking after him? You are in a tough spot, and I do understand him wanting to be home, and you making him happy, but his safety must come first. I wish you good luck with your Dad, its so hard to please them, and keep them safe from themselves sometimes! I know, I have my 86 year old FIL living with us, and he can't be left for more than a couple of hours anymore, and he displays many of the same issues as your Dad.

I still trying to figure out why, if your brother thought that your dad had been "drugged" he didn't take him to the ER, not for "proof" but to get treatment. What I sadly suspect is that dad is preying on your brother's sympathies and used him to get "home". You may need to leave dad to his own devices, with whatever outside caregivers he will allow, until "something" happens, like a fall.

The important groundwork that you need to do at this point, is to get your brother educated and accepting of your father's cognitive issues, and what that looks like. And what "mental status changes" look like and that they are cause to call the treating doctor, not accept Dad's explanation for what's causing them.

The first priority is to get dad back on the correct meds and into a good care situation. After that, it would seem that you have ample reason not to owe the 30 days rent. Get a copy of whatever the doctor's office sent to the pharmacy and to the care home. There was definitely an error here, but now you need to determine who made the error. It could have been the doctor's office, or the pharmacy and the care home. If the correct information was sent by the doctor's office to the pharmacy and to the care home, then you might ask for a meeting with the pharmacy manager and the manager of the care home. Offer to let the matter drop without further action or publicity if they will forgo the 30 day's rent. Get whatever they agree to do in writing.

If the error was made at the doctor's office, ask them to pay the 30 days. If they decline, you may need to contact an attorney who will in turn contact the malpractice carrier for the doctor and his staff.

Have you had your dad checked out medically after leaving the home? I'd be concerned that he has something medically going on, like a stroke. You don't have your profile filled in, so we don't know what your dad's medical issues are. If he has dementia or something like Parkinson's, that could explain some of his behavior. Did someone talk to the management of the home about your suspicions before removing dad? Is dad mentally coherent?

I don't know about the contract aspect of what happened, but we need more information to give you good answers.

It's my understanding that prescriptions are either faxed to a pharmacy or submitted electronically, I assume by e-mail. It would help to get a copy of what the pharmacy received. If the doctor's office in fact just called in the script, that could be the problem right there.

If that particular med was listed in the med list at the board and care facility, staff should absolutely have double checked it before administering it. If it hadn't been given before, presumably it wouldn't have been on the med list. The question then would be whether or not the staff who received and administered it realized it wasn't appropriate for the situation.

I agree with AKDaughter; her suggestion of resolution is a practical and wise one.

If you're thinking about a higher level of action, such as legal, against the board and care facility, I doubt if this one incident would support litigation. I'm just mentioning this because many people would be thinking along that line.