Mom, 93, has dementia and living in ALF. Brother, 55, has been thorn in our sides nearly his entire life. He barely dodged prison and seems to be clean now from a long-term heroin addiction, is underemployed. He manipulates everyone, especially Mom, always about money. Strong and smart dad who stood up to him and ruled the roost, passed away and put me in charge; I have DPOA and have control of finances, thank God. I have done everything I can to protect her assets according to the trust. But she will not be denied helping her precious baby boy (she refers to him like he's a child). Because of several instances where she's lost money, I keep her supplied with $60 for her wallet, more than she needs living in ALF. Now she's nastily demanding, daily, that I give her many hundreds of dollars so she "can feel comfortable". Sis and I know this is all about bro, so she can shower him with all the money she wants to, at any time. Mom has a long history of enabling him which is just what he DOESN'T need, he needs to finally stand on his own, and get a real job. I have been forced to give him rent money etc just to keep him off Mom's back and arousing her intense anxiety about his welfare. But she wants to give him far more than what I give him. She loves him so much more than she loves me and Sis, who do all the caregiving and watch out for her welfare, and she lures him to visit with the promise of money. I feel I'm in a balancing act between keeping him satisfied enough that he doesn't dump his problems on Mom and cause her terrible anxiety, and keeping her satisfied enough so she doesn't cause me sleepless nts. My brother has been a huge problem especially since Dad died that I even hired an Elder Care lawyer to advise me. But this new large money demand from Mom is stumping me. Anyone have this issue and have found a happy medium? There is no reasoning with Mom, and her anger is driving a wedge between us, and I'm her primary caregiver.