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My spouse's parent is in their mid 90's, mentally competent. Spouse's sibling gets large chunks of money from parent, at least 10K over past year or so, that we have documented proof of. The ssib is not computer literate, so we have kept tabs on a 3 way checking acct. my spouse & their sib has w/ the parent. Accidentally discovered a check to sib & have followed since.
Parent doing okay, but twice in past year came close to nursing home status.
My question--if spouse's sib would decease (we live in a filial obligation state) would my spouse then be financially responsible for parent, even tho' the sibling got all that (and probably more) money gifted to them?
Thanks in advance. Guess I think of goofy things when in the shower.

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I don't think your spouse could ever be financially responsible, if you are in the USA. Once parent's money is used up, there is Medicaid to step in. One problem might be that Medicaid will look back over 5 years, and if it appears that family took or received money, it may delay the Medicaid approval? I am not sure and it would take a specialist or attorney to answer that for how it works in your State. All I know for sure, is that it's been made clear to me, that I could never have to fork over my own resources to care for my parents if/when they run out of their own money. They had a trust, in fact, so even though we are now waiting for Medicaid for Dad, Mom is still living at home, and her half of the trust is locked up for her needs. Medicaid cannot even require that Dad use her half on his care, leaving her penniless faster. But that had something to do with how the trust was set up to start with. I know my hubby and I paid some more money a few years ago to have our trust re written in the same manner after learning how this kind of trust protected both spouses.
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Filial Responsibility Laws ARE being dusted off and rewritten and children are at an increasing risk of finding themselves responsible for their parent's long term care. Even states that don't have these archaic laws on the books are now looking into writing them. Medicaid Estate Recovery Program has gone into high gear to find and lay claim to ANY & ALL ASSETS a Medicaid Recipient has/had in order to recover their expenses. This means any inheritance the heirs might be counting on could be confiscated. So, your "goofy" question is anything but goofy.

This site has excellent resources and links to guide you through this learning process.

There was recently a case in Pennsylvania where a single child was held solely responsible for his mother's nursing home bill despite the fact this child had several siblings who were also financially sound and could have helped pay. This site also has a couple links worth following: http://www.nextavenue.org/article/2012-07/could-you-be-forced-pay-moms-nursing-home-bill

Check to be sure that the sibling hasn't somehow gotten Durable Power of Attorney. This could be a nightmare for not only you and your spouse, but for the parent as well. If the sibling has gotten DPOA, that means the sibling has complete control over ALL LEGAL MATTERS for the parent, including being able to wipe out the parent's finances and with little legal recourse for the family members. Talk to the parent and see what is going on. Time is of the essence here! Please talk to an Elder Care Attorney promptly to avoid any pitfalls you might find yourself in.
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