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My mom who has not been diagnosed with dementia by her regular doctor, but who exhibits all its signs, has gotten into a habit of calling me on her iPhone and saying that she saw my call on her phone, and then say "Oh, sorry, I am having so much trouble with this phone, I am helpless." She keeps doing that, even though I call her every day, or every other day at the rarest. Also, she's been sending text messages with her photo (that is taken inadvertently when she pushes the camera icon on a text message) in the middle of the night. It wakes me up, but I don't want to set my phone to do-not-disturb, as I want to be connected to mom, in case she really needs me. When I called her to tell her what happens when she pushes the camera icon and sends a night message, she sounded perfectly aware of that. "Yes, I know that," she said, and "Sorry if I woke you up" in a slightly angrier tone. I am contemplating a move away from my kids and a grandkid, and back to the town where my parents are now, and I don't know if I'll have the patience to be a good daughter... Yet, I feel for her... She and my Dad are together, and he is more lucid, but he pretends that nothing's going on with my mom, and they reject any help from me...

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It sounds like what you are saying is that mom is having difficulty with her phone, and you want to know if it's intentional. The inability to remember multistage tasks and to learn new processes can be an indication of cognitive decline. I would see about getting her in to a neurologist who specializes in the elderly for a good workup. No, I don't think she's being deliberately unkind.
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My mom is much farther along than yours but I can see a similarity in that it seems to be anxiety that is fuelling her behaviour. My mom was calling for me incessantly, and yet when I went to check on her she would apologize for bothering me, sometimes she would even deny that she had called at all. The root of the problem was fear and loneliness, and she seemed to need me as a touchstone to make her feel safe. Another relative newly diagnosed with LBD was afflicted with a delusion that his wife was being unfaithful. He said he knew that it wasn't right, but he believed it anyway. It shows the conflict between rational and delusional thinking.
Your mom is perhaps recognizing that things are not quite right and has developed this compulsion to connect with you. I agree with babalou, get her to a doctor for a work up. My mom has benefited greatly from medication.
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Someone with dementia isn't lucid.
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Thank you all for your helpful comments. I tried to get her to a neurologist, but she doesn't want to go. It's a process. Since this is all a new experience to me, I don't know what's "typical" or common...
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