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I had P.O.A.& guardianship of my Dad and had him placed in a home which he needed.I changed his bank details to pay for his care but my sister cleaned out his account to pay Mum's debts. My sister then kidnapped( pretty much) my Dad from the nursing home (home did not ask for any paper work from her) and took him back to her house. She got a revoking order of my P.O.A. even though Dad didn't know what he signed.mEANWHILE my Mum is still in hospital after 5 months.My sister was using their pensions to pay Mum's debts. Now Dad can't see anyone as he is locked up in her 4 storey mansion. She is emailing and texting really nasty things ( even though I can't see what I have done wrong) and now says she is going to take her 4 siblings to court. Im at a loss at what to do. I have spoken to solicitors, police and doctor but no one can really help. Any thoughts or ideas would be appreciated. PS im in Australia



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Walking away sounds good but...

If you had a POA, you had a lawyer. Where is s/he? Your sister is guilty of kidnapping.

Don't be so sure you can just walk away without repercussions. Call your lawyer!!!!!!!!!!!
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Hi best advice from me is walk away. My sisters took my father to a lawyer after I was living with him and helping him with my mother. I had to fight for my home and they did everything they could to ruin me. In the end he lost his home and put my mum in a home and now they have moved her and won't tell me where she is. The allegations made against me were false and in the end I settled out of court have have had to just move on. Your sister wants you to make a drama just walk away and leave her with it all
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Jolmur's advice is sound. Sounds like you've talked to all you can. You're sister has fired a shot across your bow and unless you've lots of money and patience to fight her, I'd walk away and let her take over the car of your mom and dad. After all, they are her parents too so I doubt she's going to abuse them. You tried to help, but sis wants to take over. Unless you feel your folks are in grave danger from her, I'd let it go for awhile and see where it goes from here.

You say sis was using your parents pension to pay mum's debt... but isn't that what the pension's for, to take care of your parents in their old age? Or are your mom and dad divorced and the pension is only his?
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I will say prayers for you and your family. I only know how to address issues like this in the United States and can not advise in Australia. You might try to find an advocate for each of your parents to come up with a plan for your parents individual and combined best interest. It appears their has been a division in the family and the fighting among the siblings is a way to avoid the feelings That she is feeling about the struggles of your aging parents. In the United States I would recommend Guargianship through the courts where a professional guardian who is not the family would be the decision maker for your parents so manage the family dynamic.
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I agree with Dustien and Jolmur. By the grace of God, you have a sister that wants to take care of your father, let her. I am so glad that I have a sister who wants to take care of my dad. God has a bigger picture for my life than a caregiver. It says to honor thy mother and father. And by my father having the resources to be placed in a nursing home, God has helped me to honor him without completely stopping my life. From what I hear, it seems that you now have the freedom to do greater works like myself.
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stay away from lawyers...your just a pay check to them. Let your sister take charge...wait a year and then legaly demand an accounting. If she spend one dime on herself...you get your father back. FYI...if she wants to care for him at home intest of in a home...I see that as a good thing. Family first.
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There are a few moving parts here. I found that my sibling's rivalry from childhood all came back when parents got sick. Then, i had to admit my parents didnt do anything to plan how they would be taken care of. Even when they were of sound mind, when suggestions to plan for the future were made, thwy woukd tell everyone what they wanted to hear by never taking any action. So i was left with my desire to be with my parents during their aging years and no way to be there regularly. I had to admit to myself that the situation is also some of their doing. Now, I do my best and I accept when I can't be there. (I tried to get my mom and dad situated 10 years before they got sick but they didn't cooperate. I made it clear i couldnt fly there as much as i might want to. They stayed.) If your sister has more money, let her take care of your parents. Ask a lawyer about protecting yourself. Your sister sounds like she is mean. And wants control. Maybe she will relent when she sees youve given up thw fight. The hardest part for me was knowing they weren't getting the love i could give them. Again, in many ways , this was their choice. Sometimes that's the hardest part.
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I agree unless you have allot and i mean allot of money to legally fight ,let things alone for now.If you were POA you must have had some "legal beagle " to assist,maybe contact that person for advice.The nursing home is at risk for letting her sign him out in that manner..In the US you cannot do that..what are the laws in your country..just take a deep breath and let things calm down for now...
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I agree monitor your sisters actions from a distance and just make sure your parents are being well cared for. That's top priority. Legally your sister can't keep you from visiting your parents. But give it some time before you take the visiting step. Time will show that being responsible for elderly parent is not as easy as it sounds. Theres alot of work and patience that drains you on daily basis. Maybe with time your sister will recognize that and then she will know that what you have beein doing for your parents was a blessing. She just might come around after a few months of caring for your Mom. Wishing the best to you all..
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The laws are different in Australia, but your profile says Beverly Hills.
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