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I looked after mom and dad in NJ for many years. After dad passed, I cared for mom (dad had done everything for her). Her house was destroyed during Sandy and my sister moved her to an assisted living facility in her state (IL). I want to visit my mother and my sister refuses to let me. She is going on an extended vacation and I wanted to spend time with mom while she was away and she is forbiding me from doing so. How can I see mom and not face the wrath of my very controlling and overbearing sister.

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I'm so sorry that you have this awful family situation. I'm not sure you can see your mom without facing down your sister, but it certainly isn't her right to forbid you to visit. I would contact the assisted living facility and tell them your story and ask about rules.Their social worker may be able to help. I hope you get to see your mom. That's important.
Carol
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