My Mom is 72 years old. She is pretty much independent however she is getting difficult to deal with. She thinks people are getting in her house and taking food or rearranging stuff. She has emotional outbursts with me. She thinks people are against her if they give her an odd look. I can't do anything right with her. You can't please her. She tells me I disappoint her because I don't put her first. She's forgetting little things like where she put her keys. The keys haven't been placed in the freezer. She's constantly rearranging the pantry or something. She says her head feels fuzzy. She complains of feeling bugs on her or biting her. The tv is so loud that its hard to stay in the same room with her. She get irritated so easily. She's always been a hard one to please but however its become increasingly more evident. Can anyone help me to understand. She's still very independent. She drives but she says mean things to not only me but others and its masked as care and concern. Help!
The first thing I noticed in my mother, who has an unspecified dementia, was her loss of reasoning ability that made her do crazy things. And there was a lot of anger when I would try to stop her from doing these things. I knew something was wrong years before a doctor finally said there was. I know how you are feeling right now.
I would not delay to pursue certain issues: Safety,. Medical, Financial and Legal.
Does your mom have a Power of Attorney and Health Care POA? If not, is she still capable to appoint one? It's difficult to help your mom if she needs it without these documents. If she has them, I would try to get the originals in my possession while she knows where they located.
And how would she pay for assistance if she needs it down the road? There are legal ways to protect assets, so I would consult with an Elder Care attorney to get advice on that. Timing is crucial as Medicaid looks at previous transfers of property and income. Get advice on that.
Your mom could have a medical condition that might explain her behavior. Her doctor could rule out bladder infections, stroke, etc. Or she might have a medication reaction or some other psychiatric condition. I'd start with her doctor, but make sure you get the POA ASAP if that is possible.
I would be concerned if she is still driving or cooking. I hesitate to tell you to hide the keys until you figure out what's going on, but I think I would. She may just think she's lost them.
Do you have someone else in the family to help you deal with this? I wish you the best. I've been there and it's not easy. It's very hard to get them help if they resist.
Sadly, something traumatic usually happens if this is dementia. They may eventually suffer a fall, get lost, damage property or suffer some crisis if there is no intervention. Good luck.
All of a sudden his appetite is diminishing. Cannot tell if he is hungry or not and eats much less than usually. He is losing his sense of direction, does not know which way to turn with the walker to get from the bathroom to the living room or bedroom. Looking at recent pictures he does not recognize himself and cannot associate his name with himself. Has constant very loose bowel movements in spite of the Immodium I give him. Has diabetes 2, high blood pressure, takes a lot of pills every day, which may be part of the cause. He is tired all day. What can I do?
Anything that happens with an old person, anything that gives you pause, act on it.