Should I get Mom a double bed?

Follow
Share

Mom has been in AL since February. She is always lamenting she misses her bed. She's on Zoloft so her mood is 50% better than it was (she was always a complainer, but now not quite as much - unless I spend more than 1/2 hour with her in her room - then that is all she knows how to do - complain.)

It was an adjustment moving from a three room IL apartment to one room AL, (dementia but she is still quite lucid and mobile) She didn't want to move but they told us she could not stay because she needed more help. She had to give up her queen size bed and dressers for a single bed and single dresser. (That's all the dresser she needed anyway - 75% of what was in the 2 dressers was junk, not clothes)
She brought up the bed again saying she feels like she is going to fall out in the night and she hates it. (Frankly, I don't blame her one bit - my hubby and I have twin beds. The queen wasn't big enough because I am restless and a king won't fit up the stairs. I end up sleeping in the guest room in the queen bed most nights. I hate the twin bed too.)

Although it will be a lot of work, finding another bed, setting it up and removing the old one, I would be happy to get her a double bed but I'm not sure that would give her much space to move around in her room. (I will ask them at AL if its ok).
I haven't brought it up with my sister yet because she will have a reason why not want to do it. She never agrees with me or wants to do anything I suggest. She will bring up she is 100 and she will complain just the same. (no doubt she will) Not that it matters, if I decide to do it, I will, and hubby and I will end up doing it ourselves anyway.

I just want to make sure Mom is comfortable and I'm not sure if the bed is just one of the complaints that is in her "loop of gripes" or if she really is needing the larger bed. (She is only about 5 ft tall and weighs 90 pounds.)

What would everyone else do?

This question has been closed for answers. Ask a New Question.
Find Care & Housing
27

Answers

Show:
1 2 3
We placed a mattress topper on my husband's bed and it helps him sleep much more comfortably.
Helpful Answer (0)
Report

Well, problem solved. Good thing I didn't get the double bed - we just moved Mom to a nursing home because assisted living can't give her the care she needs. So glad I had only just purchased the mattress pad and sheets which can be returned.
Helpful Answer (1)
Report

Dad loves the mattress topper I got him. It is so comfy.
Helpful Answer (1)
Report

Rainmom: Yea, factual reason NOT to get a used mattress=besbugs! Thank you, Rain!
Helpful Answer (0)
Report

I'm with liamalover - eeweeeee!
Helpful Answer (0)
Report

Amy: You don't want a used mattress!
Helpful Answer (0)
Report

I know I would love to make her happy with a larger bed, but with her being so small, I can't believe that the single isn't plenty big. What if the mattress was more luxurious? Would a pillow top or mattress pad make it feel better?

I have spent a lot of time in Assisted Living and Memory Care rooms. Space can be an issue, although the one my cousin is in now is pretty roomy. But, if she were to break a bone and have to be in a wheelchair, she'll need all the room in her room she can get for moving around, turning the chair, getting assistance from aids, etc.

Also, does the facility change her linens? Would they have double size sheets on hand?
Helpful Answer (0)
Report

I'm looking into it, have priced mattresses (as I can't find a used one). My sister pointed out that the bed she is using is the bed and mattress she (Mom) picked out so she could sleep in it at sis' house and she never once complained about it then........hmmm. Kind of waiting to see what she says next. The AL just went up 6% and we still don't know how much the "personal care" portion will go up. It was just taken over by Brookdale, and now they have a crazy way of charging no one understands, but its a LOT of money. I'm not sure how long she will be able to stay there for her dementia, and because of the cost. The doctor said she is amazingly healthy, nothing wrong with her except age. She still won't use the walker, is very very unsteady and we have caught her several times before she fell. Its only a matter of time before it happens and she puts herself into a nursing home, bedridden. Then, you are right Nojoy3, we would have to go back to the twin bed!
Helpful Answer (0)
Report

My Mom with ALZ DZ has a double bed and I'm finding it to be a problem. It was no big deal when she could move easier and adjust herself in bed but she is now getting frailer and needs some help getting positioned in bed. Helping her with repositioning
and getting settled would be much easier with a twin bed. Also, her room is small and there are times now when she needs to use her walker or transport chair so open space is a premium. I know we want to make our family comfortable but sometimes we have to go with practical. If you think her condition will continue to decline and she'll need help with positioning in bed I vote sticking with the twin.
Helpful Answer (2)
Report

My husband and I recently stayed at a hotel with a bed smaller than we were used to. We both remarked in the morning how much we missed our larger bed.

Several have said this very well, yes, do whatever you can to get her a larger bed. Being comfortable while sleeping is so important to her wellbeing.
Helpful Answer (1)
Report

1 2 3
This question has been closed for answers. Ask a New Question.