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The thing we also don't understand is we have done nothing but be there for her. And help her for a year and in return she has called adult protective services on us to try and get us out. What in the neck rights do we have .if any at all can someone tell me .

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My mother is trying to make us move out of her house.
Asked by pookybear42
about 2 hours ago

But all the signs are there that she is not able to Care for her self anymore .who can we contact for help .shes not realizing we are there to HELP her. And shes being very hard headed about this .who can we get to evaluate her and help her realize she can not drive anymore and she needs help. We want to keep her at home and us take care of her. We feel she is more comfortable at her home .please help what steps do we take to get help with this problem.?
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Isn't that just the most frustrating thing! You make sacrifices trying to help her, and she doesn't appreciate it at all. Grrrr....

What did APS have to say when they investigated?

Are you living in her home with her? Your profile says she has age-related-decline. No dementia is mentioned. Since she is not incompetent (in the legal sense) she does have the right to determine who is in her house.

What kind of help does she need? What are the risks if you moved out and she lived alone? Could you do some of the help if you lived elsewhere? For example, manage her finances with a computer? Come in once a week to clean, or hire a cleaner to do that? Phone her with daily reminders about her medications?

I know that you want to keep her safe and healthy, and she apparently wants her independence back. Is there some way you can achieve both of those goals?

As for the "rights" you have as her adult child and/or as her caregiver, I'm not sure there are any. If you were guardian you would have specific duties and responsibilities spelled out for you, and you could call upon help to enforce your decisions. For instance you could get help to force her to move into a nursing home.

What kind of rights did you have in mind?
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Ah, the additional information in your other post provides a little clearer picture. (Thanks, Sendhelp)

Start with her doctor for an evaluation. Perhaps she or he will provide a referral for more detailed testing. If the medical professionals give the opinion that she cannot live alone safely that puts you in a better bargaining position. ("Mom, you can't live alone. Would you rather stay home with us there, or should we help you find a nice retirement center?") But if she is not declared incompetent to make her own decisions, you may still have to rely on bargaining rather than authority.

It may take a crisis to get through to her. If she falls, if she has a small kitchen fire, if she has nothing to eat in the house, she may be more willing to accept help. (Or maybe not.)

Can you move out, live nearby, and continue helping her?
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