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She removes them without our knowledge. She doesn't feel she is "that bad" yet.

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Is there a pull up for men that has an opening so that he can pee part of the time. My husband can't alway make it on time but isn't ready for complete pull up use. thanks
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There are pads to put on the bed itself, not sure If they are "visible" and would trigger a negative response, however.
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MIL dementia issues are increasing every day so this is no longer an issue. I threw her underwear away and all she has is depends in her drawer. She doesnt know the difference between the commode or any other chair. She doesnt know what to call items and gets very argumentative.
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I had my mom in the panties type Depends and she did well in them for a while. She is 95 and has dementia. She weighs 83 lbs and is stubborn. I quit putting a bra on her. One day I found she had pulled off the pad and pulled the waist material up around her boobs. Wasn't wearing anything under her pants. She doesn't usually have any problem except when she had a bowel blockage a while back. I laughed till I cried. Her own invention!
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We put pads on the bed and I put Depends next to the toilet, in the underwear drawer, and on top of the laundry basket within reach. She'll get there.. . . .
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I had to tell my mom I wear them and I also took her under wears and replace them with her depends. So with that said she had no other choice but to wear them because she could not find her panties. I hope this was helpful. Good Luck
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Well we have the Toilet that I can put next to his bed. HOWEVER, the first time I cleaned it, I nearly threw up. I could not handle it. I would much rather clean up with the diaper and then wash him off. OMG, that toilet bucket is for strong stomachs.
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The mens pull ups come in nice colors. Don't look too bad. DH had a procedure that for a day or two he couldn't hold it. He suggested I go get him some like Moms. :-)
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I am not there yet with my partner, so cannot even post a suggestion. But, I am reading all of this and believe when the time comes, they will be pull ups...
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Yes the newer type Disposable Incontinence pants are more like underwear. My mom 91 will use these if she has had a couple of accidents. She tends to put a pad in also - not sure if that is a good idea or not but makes her happy. We do use the disposable bed pads (chucks) as well...

I agree about the clean up plan - sounds great....

Best wishes....
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I would use the disposable underpads and put 2 down to be safe...I found that larger briefs at night are less constricting for sleep, and the mess does not come out the sides as it does if the briefs are too small or tight.
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kdculley, I noticed on your profile that your Mom-in-law has memory issues. If she is still of clear mind most of the time, maybe you need to do what my Mom did regarding Dad and his accidents....

Dad [93] refused to wear Depends type products and any time there was a mess, Mom did the cleaning. Mind you my Mom is 97 years old. Mom got so tired of cleaning those messes, that the next time Dad had an oops she handed him the cleaner and paper towels... after a few time Dad finally started to buy Depends :)
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JoAnn's got it right. Pull-ups look and feel just like panties. The max-absorbency are quite effective.

Unfortunately, unless mom is changing herself and the bed plus doing the laundry? She does not have a choice. IMO, you need to be firmer about this for your own sanity.
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how about the "under pads" that just lie on the bed..."in case"
if she would wear depends the pull ups are the most comfortable I think
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Are they the diaper type or pull ups? My Mom likes the pull ups. Fit like panties with a wide pad.
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