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Mom(82) is in another country and has mild dementia. She lives in an AL there which is not a memory care or anything. The AL is ok only if you are mental faculties are good.


So: does anyone know if security cameras can be installed overseas and I can monitor from my laptop here in America?


2) Also, all my cousins have their parents living with them or their siblings either here or overseas - the parents are not alone or in any AL. So I will get a lot of grief for not moving mom over to America. How do I tell them politely to MYOB and that mom is better off in her AL place (with an aide eventually)?


I am thinking of applying for a green card for mom but I am very tense about living with mom 24/7 and burning out...


Thank you so much.


NCB (nocarebear since I'm dreading the caregiving process:-((


PS: I did have another login for this website but it's not letting me log in at all. Whom do I contact for technical support? How do I go back to that login?

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Even if the technology is available you need to find out the law around installing spy cams where your mother is before you go ahead with this plan.
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NCB, I hope you don’t let your extended family guilt or embarrass you into doing something you don’t want to do. This would be wrong, wrong, wrong. You already know this would be disasterous, so why do it? To please them? Will they help you out after they guilt you into doing it? Don’t be a Lemming and follow the crowd off the cliff.

As for spy cameras, here in the US, if you have one posted in a public place, like a facility, you have to post a notice that one or more are in use. Some have said that this rule isn’t true for patients’ rooms, but I’ve heard differently. Personally, I wouldn’t want to take a chance on being charged with invasion of privacy especially if Mom has a roommate. For certain you should check with the administrators of Mom’s facility. Better safe than sorry.
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If you brought Mom to the US she would not be eligible for any assistance like Medicare or Medicaid. Her healthcare costs would all be on you. I think its been mention on this forum its something like five years before she would qualify for Medicaid. Never for Medicare because she never paid into it.

Dementia gets worse, no cure. Eventually Mom would need longterm care that would cost 10k a month. Unless, you are willing to give up ur life 24/7 to care for her. On average a Dementia person lives five years at the minimum. They become combative, incontinent, need help bathing, toileting, etc. ALso, as a Dementia person bringing her to a different country and different culture her Dementia could accelerate. Then its getting her here. She could flip out on the plane. I agree with you, she is better where she is. About being hooked up for watching her, that would be up to the facility.
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Thank you all. I know the challenges of caring since my grandpa had dementia and I helped my mom and grandma care for him.

If I did install a webcam in mom's house, I'd definitely notify everyone there. I just want to know if international webcams exist?

I agree I should not be a lemming but I do feel bad that mom will be the only person living "alone" and not with her kids. If she stays back at her AL, I guess I will be spending a fortune on airfare...

Thanks again.
NCB
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