I live in a mult-generational home where several of us take care of mom. She is 90 years old but appears 10 years younger than she really is. Professionals tell me all of the time to place her in either assisted living or a nursing home. How can I do this when her final wish has always been to die at home. Isn't that what most people want? I am sure that is the consensus is you ask anyone where they want to live when they turn 80 and up. I can understand if a parent has debilitating Dementia/Alzheimer's disease but that is not the issue with my mother. Yes, she can be very demanding...I think elderly people aren't aware that they are being ornery and just believe it is natural that a daughter or son would want to wait on them. We have grown up in a society that believes the elderly are no longer productive members of our society and therefore useless; but have we ever stopped to think of the wisdom these oldsters have accumulated throughout their lives. I watch my mother with my 4 year old grand child and it is amazing how gentle and patient mom is with this child. Additionally, my grand child treats her as her playmate as my mother plays dolls with her endlessly and tells her nursery rhymes and songs while they play together. Sure, it's a lot of work and daughters/sons/grandchildren, etc. who take care of their parents do not really have lives of their own. But if families really work together without losing their peace of mind, it can be done. Again, I am not talking about a parent who is severely ill has to be lifted onto a hoyer lift to get out of bed or has no control over bowels has severe enough incontinence to be diapered. Or someone who is bed ridden by a debilitating disease and no longer can reason or hold a conversation. These are exceptions where I can definitely understand the need of a nursing home to intervene. But if the parent can still walk, feed himself/herself, carry on a conversation, add richness to the life a child then why shorten this person's life by throwing them away. I know my opinion is in opposition to so many negative responses on this website, but try to remember, God is giving us a gift, to have more time with our loved one and I have to consider it in this context in order to keep doing my job of taking care of her. I know I won't regret it when she is gone.