Power of attorney successor agent. Anyone have experience with this?

If your mom's friend is as old as your mom, this person may not be the right choice. Money and access to it does change people and often financial abuse is a crime of opportunity. It may be best to have an attorney (who is part of a firm) to be the successor. At least there'll be other eyes on her assets.

Yes, a POA can take advantage. It happens all the time on this forum. Is there some reason you seem to have this gut feeling? I believe in gut feelings. As said, if friend is Moms age, she should not be Moms POA. Has the friend agreed to be POA. If so, her duties should be spelled out for her. My Mom did not have alot but I would not be POA again for anyone.

Twili, to ensure mom's wishes are being followed everything should be in writing. This person should be paid for their time and agree to the responsibility, because she isn't covered if this friend says nope.

If you are concerned about self dealing, you require an annual audit by a 3rd party.

Our successor agent is an attorney and it is written into our POA when and how they become active POA and that a disinterested 3rd party does an annual audit. We even have what type of music we would want for music therapy in our directives.

You just never know what tomorrow holds, so laying it out in black and white is a true gift for everyone involved.

Successor POA only comes into effect if you are unable to act as mom's POA.

If it is not written as successor and is joint or co-POA your concerns are valid.

Here's the thing with POA, you need to have confidence and trust in the person or you need someone else. Because it does convey life changing powers to the person named.

I trust my gut. If I can't shake a feeling, I believe that is a reason to listen and act.

Perhaps reviewing the document with a certified elder law attorney and sharing your concerns can help create a document that protects mom as much as possible.

Yes, there are dirty attorneys out there, so you do your due diligence and put protections in place. Here's the deal when using professionals, they cheat and they not only get prosecuted but, they lose their licensing and their insurance gets to pay a nice settlement. They have more to lose then a friend.

There should ALWAYS be a successor and it is mom's choice. Successor is required to follow direction in mom's docs just as you are.

Thank you all for your answers. I will review it with an attorney. I think I'm just being overprotective but will check it.

In my opinion, there should always be a couple of people in line, so I was POA for my parents, next up was my brother, and after that was their bank's trust department.

That should save any concerns about a third party being involved, because a bank would be in a world of trouble if they messed around with someone's finances.

I recommend anyone who's getting older to use a smaller community bank where they actually get to know you vs. B of A, Chase, or Wells Fargo where you're invisible. My parents were very comfortable with their banker, and they worked seamlessly with me when I became POA because I'd gone in and met them with my dad before he died.

We have requested (from our Estate Planning Attorney) to hire a professional guardian service if I should pass before my husband who is on the long dementia journey. We have requested that they report to her so that she can keep them in check.

After my wife passed I made some changes..My elderly mother lives with me...I have both a relative and a close family friend who can each assist her if I am deceased before her...This way both of the individuals know and trust each other...and with the attorney these two can coordinate decisions if needed,,,

Twilightzone: Perhaps you should pose your query to your elder law attorney.