Please let me know how to initiate a visit with a loved one with Alzheimer’s dementia who is delusional and does not want to see you?

Would she even recognize you? Make visits short unannounced, to see how she reacts. If you are a trigger for bad behaviors facility may ask you to stay away. It is about what is best for mom. Do Not remind mom of who you are, why provide the trigger if not necessary.

so the assisted living is not able to dispense her antipsychotic meds? can they smash it up in some pudding or dessert - has AL offered any solutions to help her take her meds?

you might want to contact her doctor and expain the problem with her meds? idk if they could help. but it seems like getting her to take meds would in turn help out the memory care staff in helping her - in helping everyone involved.

EDIT maybe if you can get the doctor to put it in writing - doctor orders - the memory care will have to carry it out. (possible to smash rx in food? idk)

Oops meant occurs on weekend, not soccer.

The AL said they can’t force her, if she refuses they waste it. As a result her behavior became bad and she would strike out at husband or yell. Since this occurred AL said she could not stay and she had to go to memory.

Fortunately and unfortunately she acts normal and knows who everyone is, off the meds she is delusional and angry and blames those closest to her . The diagnosis is new to us, dad remains in AL and unfortunately all exacerbation soccer on a weekend or when Family is away. I was able to talk her into taking meds but since she is angry now she refuses to take “the poison” and is aware enough to ask what meds they are. Memory does not do any heroic attempts leaving us frustrated and helpless. She is not rational but knows who we are.

That’s a great idea, thanks!

Even with medications, the behavior of Alzheimer’s patients is very unpredictable. Add to that psychosis and it can be even more hard to predict how they will react. People with Alzheimer’s don’t react well to new surroundings. They feel threatened and can act out. When I had a friend take my mom to her house for Thanksgiving Mom wound up in the hospital 2 days later with chest pains. I never took her out of her facility again. The days of “happy times” and fun excursions may be over for your mom, sad to say.

I agree with having the doctor put in writing that they must give her the meds. Is her medication available in a trans-dermal patch? Some are.

I am not sure if there is a transdermal patch but will talk to the physician to find out. We only received the diagnosis 3 weeks ago and they said it was stage 5, up until then we just thought she was acting out.