It's verbal mental and emotional;_( I can't take it anymore. I've been seeing a therapist, she said pay someone to care for him, that's kind of hard if you don't have the money or job. I've also gone to his Dr. who knows how he is and tells me I have to take care of him, because no one else will, gone to Office of the Aging to get him out for awhile, they can't help and he doesn't want to go. One example of what he does is; he will poop and pee in his pants and give them to me to launder for him with the poop still in them. When asked why do you do that he said to get under her skin-meaning me, or to break her horns. What kind of person does that. As children he would punch us all over the house, use a Bull Whip on us, and then we would pee our pants as children from the beating, and he would say oh you pissed your pants now I'm going to give you something to pee your pants for, and you got beat even more. I am 55 years one of 5 children and the only who does anything. no one wants anything to do or for him. Why and how come it is ok for him to do this. I don't understand and can't take it anymore. As far as I can see it, if I pay someone to do what he should do I will still be abused, and that's like rewarding a bad child. So he gets rewarded for being bad and I'm paying for it. Where does that make any sense? And every time I find myself a job outside the the home, he'll do something to wind up in the hospital and I have to quit my job because I'm told there has to be someone at home with him. So that's how gets me to be with him 24/7 and just beat me down to nothing. I have no more friends, because I don't go out. I have no outlet for me. Nothing! He even smokes in the house after my Husband had lung cancer surgery and lost a half of a lung, and there is to be no smoking in the home according to his Drs. at Memorial Sloan Kettering. My father doesn't care about anyone but himself, and he'll tell you that. Please someone help me??? I'm crying terribly as I'm typing this. I also live in upstate NY. Thank you!