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My sis believes its withdrawels from his dilaudid meds. He ran out. the tremors subsided but because of his multiple health problems including multiple myeloma, I am concerned that these tremors may have been a sign of something else. He also has COPD. He's 58. She and I are all he has....he won't let me help because I "smother" him at the drs office by bringing up issues like this. Should I just back away? My sis had a stroke three weeks ago, and also has high blood pressure, scoliosis. What should I do?

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If it was me and my brother, I'd send a note to his doctor informing him of your relationship to your brother and then talk about his tremors and the medications he's been on. The doctor can choose to use that information or not. And you know you've done what you could to alert medical personnel to his true situation.

I know it's very hard when a loved one won't do what they can to help themselves.
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I try to sit or stand behind mom at the MD office, but facing the doctor. If she tells a lie, I silently shake my head NO. The MD never misses a cue and appreciates the silence.
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Thank you. His tremors only happened once last week at his house. So the Dr. didn't witness it. It truely scared my sister. But you are right about the patient being the one who should be in control. It's heartbreaking to watch him and then to know that he isn't telling the dr. everything. Can'f fix that.This has been since 2009 when he was diagnosed with the multiple myeloma, and then the myriad of illnesses that were discovered after that. He won't allow me to take him to the Dr. anymore because I would bring a list along to give him and help remind him of what questions to ask. Hardest thing is knowing to leave it alone now.
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When you accompany the patient to the MD's office, you sit to the side and you zip your lip unless the MD turns in your direction. The MD sees the tremors. The MD knows there is high blood pressure. You wait until he is done or he says to you "Do you have any questions?" and you ask " Is there anything I can do for his tremors?" Same for your sis. The patient WANTS to be in control. You play along with that, you give them a sense of control and then things flow better.
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