My Dad is paralyzed on his left side from stroke. He wants to go in toilet but SNF keeps him in diapers. What can we do to help him?

zookeeper is right, get written orders from an MD to toilet him every two hours, as long as that is not too much stress on his body.

Stop. Don't talk to the staff. Instead, talk to your dad's PCP and see if he ordered that your dad's use of the Hoyer Lift and other transfers be limited. If not, ask the doctor to place an order on your dad's chart that requires the facility to use the lift to transfer him to the toilet when needed. Then check to see if they do it. If the doctor didn't order limited transfers, the staff is just being lazy. Amazing they'd rather clean the bed linens and patient instead of just doing the transfer. I mean, we all know the Hoyer transfer would take less time, but some staff might think it's more effort than just cleaning up the mess. The other issue may be that they don't want to respond to his calls to go at the time he calls and they want to deal with his BM on their own schedule when they get around to it. Very common in NH's. Either of those situations is not acceptable and you should report it to administration, if that's what you find out.

It's no picnic cleaning a bedbound bowel movement. It is smushed all over the place.

Don't you think if the aides thought they could get him to go in the toilet, they would? Ask them about the situation.

Have you talked to the social worker at this facility? Who has declared it dangerous for him to use the toilet? Is he getting physical therapy to increase his core strength? Ask for a care meeting where all departments are represented (nursing, pt, social work).