Nursing home placement for parent with vascular dementia with behavior issues?

Ms. Madge, i dont care what the ratings say, i would be on the phone to the Board of Health and the Ombudsman!

Ms. Madge, I am so sorry to hear this. The more I speak to others in our situation, the more appalled I get. I thought that private pay facilities would be more stellar compared to non-profits, but I guess, like anything else, it just depends. I know there's no 'perfect place' but there must be an affordable (whatever that means) facility that provides residents an overall good quality of life. Hang in there. Sending you good wishes.

Esme
I understand your struggle
I'm trying to find another alternative for my 93 year old mom who has been in a private pay memory center for 6 months - it handles more than 60 residents and at times seems like a circus - this is true especially on weekends when more families visit adding to the commotion

While one old house dog may be find this place has two,plus several residents have pets all of which run around eat off residents plates and relieve themselves in the dining room - staff doesn't have time for residents care let alone all these animals which are a fall hazard - staff regularly bring their kids to work who also run around adding more noise and a fall hazard
The behavior issues of the residents are disturbing too most of which goes unchecked
Since the facility is considered the best in the area I'm scared to think of where my mom will end up when the money runs out

Yes, Babalou, they're checking his meds for possible readjustment. I, too, believe there must be a way to help without too much sedation. We understand the behavior issues are hard to deal with (we've witnessed the episodes) but we're hoping for a good balance this time. Thank you for responding.

Thank you, Vstefans. This is helpful. Sounds like we just have to keep plugging along. Yes, we hope the 3rd time is a charm as well. Take care.

Esme, are they working on getting psych meds calibrated at the behavioral unit? Many folks with VaD issues can be helped and not just sedated with a combo of antidepressants, antianxiety meds and perhaps an antipsychotic.

Any place with some resident animals or therapy animals visiting, that's a good sign too.

It can be hard to pick a good one that is also a good fit - two bad, one good does not sound too far fetched. You could hit the jackpot next time or have to try a couple more. You can almost always walk in and do a bit of an unauthorized tour - see if people are up and about, assess the atmosphere, is it cheerfully busy vs oversanitary and sterile? (of course, I learned the hard way my mom preferred oversanitary and sterile to homey and chatty, but that's another story.) My mom used a total of 7 different non-hospital facilities, and of those only two were a poor fit, and one of those was really very good, just a poor fit for Mom; that was the only move we made for needing a "better" facility per se, everything else was for different stages of rehab and care or moving her to my home town instead. It took a LOT of legwork, but was worth it. And of course a good facility can go downhill fast if management or reimbursement changes unfavorably.