Not really a question... watching my mother this last week, I believe that her time is near.

Hello again since our last message I have been very fortunate to get continuous care from hospice for my mother and it has made such a difference. They are able to keep her pain-free and help me with all of her repositioning needs. We know her time is getting close but still her vitals are strong. They keep telling me it is eminent but nobody can figure out When the actual time will come she has had no food or fluid in 10 days but I feel happy to know that she is not in pain we are spending time with her in the room and playing favorite TV shows and music. I hope your journey is getting better sending prayers and hugs.

Enduring,
So sorry for your (temporary) loss. One day we all will be together again.
You were/are SO fortunate to have had a great mom. I was so envious (in a good way) when reading all the things that your mom did for you and with you. How I would have loved that as a kid. She sounds like June Cleaver, Harriet Nelson, Carol Brady and Donna Stone all rolled into one. As Midkid said, some of us weren’t so lucky. I’d have given anything to treasure the memories you have. What a great gift and you can pull those memories out anytime you want or need to. You were richly blessed.

My mom and I weren’t close (she was narcissistic) but I stuck by her through 8 years of Alzheimer’s (89-96 years old). Last year, a few months before she passed away she told me she loved me. She wasn’t sure who I was but she knew I had been there for her. I remember her smiling with confused little eyes. I was waiting a long time to hear that. She died this year on March 15. I was so glad that her struggle was finally over. I wish I could have your memories but I’ll treasure her little “I love you.” as long as I live.

Enduring, my heart goes out to you. I wish you peace and comfort at this time. I am very sorry for your loss. Thank you for sharing as it helps us all as we travel down this road with our loved ones. God bless.

I am sorry for your loss. Thoughts and prayers are with you and your family in the days ahead.

You have been truly blessed to have as a mother a woman you love and adore. I hope you are SO grateful for that.

Not all of have that, never did, never will. It impacts us daily and not always in good ways.

What a sweet tribute, I wish you peace and calm in the coming days.

Hugs ED,

May The Lord God grant you grieving mercies during this time.

Praise God that you know you will see her again one day and this is but a brief separation.

Thank you all for your prayers, good thoughts, and for sharing your personal stories.
It was tough...my mom was a strong willed woman whose dimentia kept her from fully grasping her condition. She fought the inevitable like a true warrior.
She finally came to peace and rest last night.
I was at her bedside holding her, soft light, Christian music and just encouraging her to allow her soul to be set free, from the prison her body had become.
With two small breaths, a slight smile, and a "brightening" of her face, she left this stage of her life.
God is so very good; I am so blessed and grateful to have cared for her and to be given the gift of being with her at her time of crossing.
On eagle's wings mom...FLY!

Enduring, Hugs!

May God grant you grieving mercies and strength may He give your mom a peaceful passing.

I know what you are going through OP. peace to you. Godspeed to your mom.

My heart goes out to you . I pray that you find peace after she is reunited with her siblings and parents . My mother is still hanging in there but I’m dreading that day that will come soon.

That is a beautiful tribute to your loving mom - I miss mine every single day!

I am in the exact same situation. My mom has been declining while in hospice care for the last month and a half. I am taking care of her in my home and it is definitely horrific! That was the perfect word because witnessing somebody so strong and amazing become paralyzed and unable to move her body or drink and swallow. I have difficulty getting the words out but I do keep rubbing her head and holding her hand and kissing her forhead, unfortunately I need to give her meds but she is not working with me. I’m praying for her to have a quicker transition so she can be for me I miss her sleep hell she’s going through. The nurse could not tell me for sure if she was in the active dying phase yet because her vitals are so damn strong. My mom was always so healthy never drank or smoked but ovarian cancer took her down hard. If I can’t get her to respond soon will have to get the nurse back out sometime she listens to other people .

My sister and I spent as much time as we could with mom while she was in hospice! We told her how much we loved her. We reminisced happy times! We told her we would miss her but it was time to let go and not be afraid. She didn't wake up after her stroke but she responded by moving her toes or hand. That day we communicated as much as we could and tried to make sure she understood she was getting excellent care! It was difficult but I am glad we spent that time with her.
Blessings to you!

Be the closest you can be to your loved one, because in a little while you will never see them again. Be kind to yourself and don't worry if other relatives are going to partake in what is happening. Be strong for your loved one. I didn't think I could do it in the end with my grandma watching her suffer,I was so scared but deep down I knew she depended on me to be there for her. Many times I would go to the bathroom or downstairs and cry my eyes out litterally. But every time I went in her room, I had a big smile on my face and lots of love to give to her. My gram slipped into a coma state in the very end and I kept talking to her. They still can hear, so talk up a storm.😃

You can get through it hard as it is. You do have support. Jun 29, it will be 3 yrs. I did it "alone" No time to gather real family and friends. Hospital gave "hope" she would beat it, Sepsis, then did a mixture of saying let her go along with ASAP.

Upon visiting and seeing the tips of her fingers and back of her head have cyanosis, I knew it was time.

The only person, not part of Pallative care or Spiritual, to show compassion was the 2 nurses. The dude who had called to push for letting her go, not only mentioned she was "dead" when she was brought back to ICU 5 days earlier, but acted like a kid in a candy store when he learned life support would be terminated. His behavior was so inappropriate, the Pallative care Doc asked to him to leave.

The nice nurse called to say she passed at 5:07 PM, 7 minutes after life support stopped.

Hospital wanted her out of there so fast, "doc" non medical staff member called police to deliver message to call them. Called, staff member mentioned start of decom to drive home the point they needed her out of there. Went back to sign,so they could release her to funeral home.
Later found out doc submitted his invoices to get paid, Jul 4, day after she was signed out and hospital sent her a survey on the care she got.
Peace is not dealing with this hospital or docs.

That's how I said goodbye to Mom.

Beth Chapman

Thank you everyone for your very kind words, suggestions, and for sharing your personal journeys of losing a loved one.
My mom is still hanging on...she is more on the other side than she is here, but being a strong woman & her constant need to "fix" things, is preventing her from completely letting go and exiting her worldly body.
It is a most difficult time to see her stuck in this in between stage. I am telling her that she's worked hard and now it's time for her to rest....to go home. Dad and so many others are waiting for her.
I believe it's a matter of days now.
Yes hospice is involved and I have a wonderful husband who my mom loves like a son (and vice versa) and a sister who's close by.
Thank you all.❤️

Well I am crying as I am reading this beautiful post. My heart goes out to you during this time. I pray that God will give you the strength as you continue on this journey. I took care of my father before he died, he came home from the hospital and died four days later. I was told he had 2 years to live. I lit candles and put soft music on. I held his hand all night and then he passed the next day. My family was all present. I am so grateful I was with in when he died. Taking care of my dad in his last days was a blessing but it was extremely stressful, my father was so strong all his life and to see him weak and frail was heartbreaking but I got through it. His journey is done here on earth and now he is with the Lord. I find comfort knowing I will see my dad again in the next world.
Is hospice involved? Do you have family for support? God bless you for being such a caring daughter. My thoughts and prayers are with you during this very difficult time in your life.

Her life has been longer than most & it sounds like she raised a loving daughter & had a lasting marriage. Dying is natural for us though & to die of old age is a blessing. It sounds like you are doing all the right things to make her feel comfort & love. Cherish your moments & although the last ones are hard, remind yourself that it's natural to shut down eventually & as long as she's at peace & you've tended to all her comforts, then all the love she tilled on earth will be carried with her.

When my mom was dying, I reassured her that we would be watching over Dad and make sure he was all right. I wanted to sing a hymn to her, but couldn't think of one to use that was appropriate. After she died, I thought of what I wanted to sing: "Softly and tenderly Jesus is calling--calling Oh Sinner come home. Come home, Come home. Ye who are weary come home." I had learned that in Sunday school and just couldn't remember it at the hospital. But reassuring her that we would watch out for Dad was important to her and gave her permission to let go and go on.

It helps me to remember this admonition in my faith: "I have made death a messenger of joy! Wherefore dost thou grieve?" That helps with letting go and thinking of them in a much happier place. Yes, I miss them, but why would I want them back from such joy?

My mom died early on Mother's Day before we could go back to the hospital to visit her again. Her favorite flowers--Lilacs--were blooming in her garden and became part of her funeral flora arrangements. And, we believe we will be with her and our grandparents and other loved ones again when we go to the spiritual world. In the meantime, there are things here I am responsible for and I want to do them well. There are others that will need our help, love, and consoling, too.

I like that you feel it is a blessing to be able to care for your mom. I think my mom wanted to die in private to make it easier on us. She had ovarian cancer that had spread and her last days were in the hospital where it was easier to have care for her and deal with her passing. After my dad died, I brought many of the things my mom cared about home with me now. It's like a memory room and sometimes I go there and just reflect on the things that happened and the care she gave to us while growing up, remembering her voice and thoughtfulness, the love I felt and feel for her yet.

Dear lady: When your mother crosses over to the "other side," believe me when I tell you that she will send signs in the way of "pennies from heaven." Oftentimes, one sign will be a cardinal who comes visiting. Prayers sent to you, dear lady! Those things were a source of some measure of comfort when my own mother went to be with the Lord.

I think you've already found your way to do that...and you are blessed to have such a good relationship with your mother. I often wonder how things will go for my mother, for me as our relationship has been somewhat antagonistic.

Daughter, joining you in prayer🙏🏽At a difficult chapter in you & your mother’s lives that God’s will be done in both of you💕. God is faithful & He is able‼️
Meditate and call to memory the Words of Comfort from our Lord & Redeemer-Jesus Christ: to His friends Mary & Martha:
“Jesus said unto her, I am the resurrection, and the life: he that believeth in me, though he were dead, yet shall he live:”
John 11:25

Reverend Council🎚📖

I am in tears reading your post, because you sound like me. This is exactly the way I feel about my mom that I take care of. What a beautiful tribute.

Good bye is never the end. They can do more for you on the other side then ever here. You will see signs she is still with you. She will send a flower in bloom when winters cold has taken them away. She will send birds to sit next to you. She will always be with you. Always remember the amazing person you are.. She does...

You are a loving daughter. You are in my thoughts and prayers.

You are an angel, Mom is very lucky to have you, dear...I am so sorry for I know how you feel. My Mom died of cancer back in December, I had just moved and was not with her on her Deathbed but Instead, I came up around Christmas to make all the Final arrangements.
Make sure you Make good with God, Mom with yourself, So it will be Easier to Deal with when the time comes. You have already Accepted that Death is Near, So with The Lord, Just one step away to Know Mom will be in a Better Place and that you were by her Side for the Ride.

God has you and cerntanly God has her. The body has a way of not wanting to give up. Pray with her. Climb in the bed with her hold her she needs you there more than she needs anything right now. Hold her she loves you and needs you to tell her you will be ok. Take a chance climb in bed with her hold her she needs you there now.

My mom just passed away on March 30th. She was on hospice and since she had some dementia she didn't fully grasp when she was at the very end. She slipped back and forth between here and 'there' and saw so many things that I couldn't see while sitting with her. I sat beside her and caressed her head and held her hand and told her stories - the stories she had shared over the years from her own childhood. I retold them to her. I would think she was sleeping and then all of a sudden she would smile, so I know she heard me. She seemed to want to visit the early days the most - when she was a little girl, or especially when she was a teenager and living on the fort with her family during WWII. She loved those days, so those were the stories I told. I would say in an slightly excited voice, "Remember when you would sneak off and go ice skating?" Or, "Remember when you got stuck on the beach when the tide came in and only the cliff was behind you and you had to scramble as best you could?" I know she enjoyed the retelling of her life. I cherish those last days that I spent with her because they were so special and otherworldly. My mom saw things I couldn't see - family members who she hadn't seen in decades. I often apparently brought 'someone' in with me, because my mom would look up and say brightly, "Who is the smiling girl with you?" I started to joke that I was a spiritual Uber driver and bringing in people with me. It was a special time. My mom was ninety and had a good life. I feel like those last days spent with her were truly a gift.

Tell her your going to miss her more then the people she gets to meet up with again. That you couldn't be any happier for her and excited about not having to say goodbye because she's going to be so full of hellos to and from her friends and family. Saying goodbye is so full of sadness. Making it a happy moment will make it memorable for the both of you. Heck give her a welcome home party in honor of those who are waiting for her. Celebrate the wonderful life you've experienced together!