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I want to get something like a diaper pail and one that I can deodorize. However, I don't want to get a baby's diaper pail as I think my mother might find it insulting. Do they have "adult" pails that look like they would be more likely to be used by adults? If so, where I can I buy one?

The issue is that I'm trying to respect my mother's dignity and treat her as an adult. I call her incontinence pads "pads" and I want to steer clear of anything that might insult her dignity. She is emotionally struggling with all of this and I try to be careful what I do and say about it all to be really sensitive about it.

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Diaper pails stink to the high heavens. I can still remember how heavy it was when it was full. Get a kitchen garbage can with a little pedal that flips the lid up and drops closed to keep odors contained. Deodorize it with scented liners or spray Febreze inside the bag. The pads have to be taken out of the house daily or ammonia odors become annoying.
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Hopefully, when I'm her age, I'd like to think those around me will remember that I'm both a human being and an adult.
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I despise "young lady," as well. It's silly.

However, with that said, the only people I forgive for using any of these words or phrases are waiters and waitresses in diners, who seem to pretty generally use those terms for everyone.

I guess the trick is that I know I would want to be treated like a regular person, which is what we all are, regardless how old we get.
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Thanks. Now that you say this, I can now picture a small can for this purpose and that will not offend her sense of maturity. Thank you so much. I just never thought of this, so I can't tell you how much I appreciate you mentioning something so easy to get and use.
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pst is right on the money about this. A kitchen garbage can, small, with a locking lid that can be opened by a foot pedal. That's your answer.

And good for you for thinking about your mom's dignity. I never used the word "diaper" to my dad, it was always a "brief". I work in home healthcare now and I never say the word "diaper". Like you, I think it's important that we don't infantilize our elders.

P.S. I also hate the sing-song-y voice some women (usually women) use with elders. Nurses at the Dr.'s office or in the nursing home. I'm insulted by it.
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The other words that I do not like is being called "dearie or honey or sweetie"...mostly seems condescending...since I hardly know them...sooo frustrating for me. Oliveoyl
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How true...laughing..
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