What do you do when you have no way to control the money your Dad (83) is spending?

Have your mother take most of the money out of the account and put it in another bank without his name on it. It's her money and future too!

I think your best option would be to apply for guardianship over your dad. He needs someone to look out for him financially or he's going to ruin his life and guardianship will accomplish this.

I made that sound like guardianship will accomplish ruining his life. I mean to convey that guardianship will prevent your dad from spending all of his money.

Yes Guardianship is the way to go before he is totally penniless.

Are your parents still married and living under the same roof? Where does your Mom stand in all of this? It would seem that her opinion should weigh heavily in their financial decisions, whether they be sound or poor ones. Does she acknowledge your Father's growing incompetence? Perhaps she should communicate her concerns with your Father's doctors or contact an attorney to get some sound legal advice as it would be in her best interest to know that she is able to better protect herself and her husband's futures by protecting their financial interests.

The spouse has a vested interest in protecting joint assets. Your mom has a right to demand that her SSA and any pensions etc that are due to her, come directly to her. She does NOT have to agree to having a joint account with your father and getting her assets out of any joint accounts may be a good idea. The issue is not just joint access, but joint liability, as well. It sounds like dad is doing unpredictable things with finances. I personally do not believe in joint accounts except for joint expenses, because I have suffered through financial abuse in a marriage with an irresponsible lying partner. You have to trust someone to have joint accounts, and when that trust is gone, it is time to stop that. Separate account force communication and accountability. Too often, men think they should run it all, and make choices that often favor their position, rather than their partners. I am already starting to see this with the roll out of ACA. Husbands politically opposed to Obamacare refusing to get insurance despite their spouse needing insurance, with no subsidies for persons who file separately. So to get insurance, the wife has to go begin her husbands back, must file the joint return, and wait fir the wrath to come later.

First get Adult Protective Services involved. The more evidence you can gather, the better your case in Court to have him declared incompetent or at the very least under a 72 hr. hold in a psychiatric hospital so he can be adequately evaluated. Sounds like a mental illness with hoarding involved and he does need help. Document all the people who are calling to address their concerns about him. Discuss his behaviors with your mother too. This requires an immediate intervention. Good luck!

Do you have Power of Attorney set up? I recommend doing that. It's helped me as I handle my father's finances. I've had to work with dad's banks when he started taking out loans that now he can't afford the monthly payments. POA is easier to set up than guardianship. I agree you and your mom should talk to your local Pro Sr. which is an attorney who is knowledgeable about elder law.

Make an appointment with a good attorney that specializes in Elder Law and explain the situation. One of my colleagues had this problem with his father in law and the attorney laid out the easiest path to resolve the problems.

I agree with ConcernedDtr ... you can have a Durable POA which can be given based on his deteriorated mental capacity. Check with an attorney. It is not expensive to get that done, and you and your mom will pay for it out of their checking account.