Follow
Share

I saw some old threads with this issue but am looking for additional advice. My grandparents (93 and 95) don't have any valid form of photo ID or proof of birth. My grandfather has an expired drivers license which won't be accepted as proof of birth or ID in NY. We can cobble together proof of identity based on utility bills, bank statements, tax returns, etc., but aren't able to find ANY documents with proof of birth (a requirement). They have no birth certificates--only baptism records. Complicating things further, neither of them use their given names (Vincenzo and Giovannina). I thought to try to request a search for their birth certificates from the Vital Records Office, but they may come back with names that don't match the names on all their other proofs of identity (bills, tax forms, etc.)!

They can normally get away with showing a medicare card, an expired ID, or Union member card for MD appointments and other mundane needs, however having zero form of valid gov't-issued ID seems irresponsible. My grandfather needed to have a pension form notarized to prove he was still alive and the banker only did it for him since he is a longtime customer....getting scary.

Anybody have any suggestions of how we can get things worked out to prove these people are who they have been for the past century (give or take)?

This question has been closed for answers. Ask a New Question.
Find Care & Housing
I had a similar problem when my mother gathered all her and my dad’s important papers and hid everything. I went online and ordered new birth certificates, driver’s license, Medicare cards, you name it.

You’d look for your state government websites. You ought to be able to find instructions to do what you need. There should be a telephone number if you need to talk to a human about those pretty names and your problem with them.

The baptism certificates? Would the church keep records?

It took me a week to get everything on it’s way to my dad through the USPS.
Helpful Answer (5)
Report

Do they have passports? Even an expired one is proof of citizenship.
Helpful Answer (4)
Report

Maybe a place to start. Call your vital records department at the county or state level. Ask which documents you would need in order to create a bc for your parents. The baptismal records are good. Perhaps your parents have social security cards. Your birth certificate might even help as it would show their names as well. I’m sure there is a list of documents that they might accept. Perhaps affidavits from people who have known them a long time. I know my FIL bc was made from his baptismal records. Things are a lot tighter now due to homeland security.
Helpful Answer (7)
Report

My 89-year-old mother passed away in April. She never had a government ID either. Never. She never drove so she never had a driver's license. Mom's problem was her mother did not include Mom's first name on Mom's birth certificate, so the family legend was no agency would accept her birth certificate.

Mom's favorite aunt had passed away a couple years ago, and about six months ago, my great-aunt's caregiver sent a box to Mom. In it was a corrected birth certificate that included Mom's first name! There was her baptism record and a couple affidavits from long-time friends. I thought, "How cool. I'll take her for her first government ID card!" That thought didn't last long as Mom was extremely hard to take out of the house, then having to wait in line at the DMV? Uh, no.

Anyway, 97yroldmom's advise is great about calling the agencies first and present the problem as well as other documents that support that she was your mother. Let them tell you what documents they'll accept. I'm sure they hear it all the time, and may be able to give you suggestions too. Good luck.
Helpful Answer (6)
Report

go to vitalchek.com for any birth records. if they are available, they will have them. you can get them overnited if needed. hope this helps, Bobby
Helpful Answer (3)
Report

Were ur parents born in the US? If so, where and what County? Home birth or hospital. Home birth may be tricky if their parents didn't send info to the County. Hospitals usually did this. The Baptism should show their real names. Old Bibles showing Date of birth? You need to know the county they were born in. That Counties Vital Statisics should have a record. Baptisms are usually done within 6 months of birth.

If born in another country, you will need to contact them.

If they have a passport, then they had to have a birth certificate. When u apply originals are required which are returned. Passports are your best ID. Have you checked to see if they have a safe deposit box. Some people keep their important papers in them. You can't get a drivers licence without a birth certificate so he had to have one to show when he applied.
Helpful Answer (1)
Report

Call the DMV and they have this home bound senior service where they will come and take the picture and fill out paper work at home. The wait list can be long, but it might be worth looking into.
I had to pay for gurney transport for my Moms ID card, and I made an appointment so no waiting. She didn't need any paperwork, just her social and old ID card number.
Helpful Answer (7)
Report

What are you needing the ID for, or this because you want to be prepared if asked?

Many people are known by names that are not the one on their birth certificate. Often different prices of govt I’d will have different names. My Uncle Bill has the name Bill, not William on his drivers license.

My step Mum is known by 3 different names, the most common one is a Nickname. My mother is called a different name than the one on her birth certificate too, but it has not been an issue.

Thinking it over most the people I know over 80 do not use their birth name. It should not be too complicated to work out.

I have a cousin in law who has a credit card issued in her first married name. She remarried 47 years ago, but never got around to changing the name on the card.
Helpful Answer (3)
Report

Same thing with my mother. Contacted the DMV to get a state ID card. I got her birth certificate first which you can order online - just google search it. You should contact your local county office for aging. They can help you. They helped me get my mom on Medicaid and if you know anything about Medicaid, it is a lot of gathering of all the ID papers, marriage certificate and banking statements and tax returns, etc and it's no easy task when all you have for your parent is an SS card. But it can be done! The first thing you want to do is get Power of Attorney on both parents. You will not be able to do anything without that.
Helpful Answer (0)
Report

My parents were both born in the 1920’s at home in NYC and just assumed that they did not have birth certificates. Turns out the midwife filled out a card which was available through New York State and both of them did have a valid birth certificate. They have a website you can use to get copies.
Helpful Answer (2)
Report

I recently had that discussion with our minister about church record keeping. According to him, issuance of birth certificates is now common but not so many years ago. Further, if no birth certificate, the baptism record is considered legal record of birth....used as proof for passports, etc.
Helpful Answer (0)
Report

Yes. Ancestry.com may can help as well as online libraries. Everyone has a past...and people who pass info around are still plentious. Look for old photos and post as...do you know this pair? Also trace back from old bills...ss card and scraps of of clippings they may have saved. Genetic testing may produce findings as well but get heels clicking as time does not stand still! What an honor to know them!
Helpful Answer (0)
Report

Agree. DMV will take expired license. Just had to get one for dad who could not do his iwn banking.
Helpful Answer (1)
Report

Oh my. I went through the same thing with my Mom. She never renewed her driver's license after age 91, even as a non-driver. Who would know you had to do that, unless you have been through it before? She could go to the doctor's with that ID, but she couldn't use it at the casino... Go figure...

I wanted Mom to add me to her bank account so I could pay her bills when she couldn't sign her name any longer. The bank would not accept her expired driver's license. I ran into roadblocks everywhere because of that ID issue. 

I took her with her expired driver's license to the DMV two years after it expired. They could see that it was the same person and I could prove she lived at the same address. But, they wouldn't do it. They told me that they purge their systems after a year, and don't have her in the system any longer. So, I would need a birth certificate or a passport. I couldn't request a birth certificate online because they figured because of her age, this was done for genealogy purposes. I ended up calling the NJ vital records. I don't remember what went on there, but I think it was going to take a while to get and I was running out of time. Soon, Mom would not have understood why I wanted to be on her account...

Finally, an old colleague notarize the POA form without her being present because he knew what I was up against. Much later, I found Mom's valid passport; but she has declined too much, so it doesn't do me any good now. 

This has all been a learning experience.... I know now what to do if my husband or I are in that situation. 
Helpful Answer (0)
Report

In Michigan after a lot of phone calls and research, I found out that there was a non-publicized program that allowed me request an official state ID from my 97-year-old Dad's expired driver's license. It had to go through an unpublicized disabilities office. If I can remember, I had phoned my Dad's state rep, explaining that Dad was unable to "travel" to a Secretary of State. They used the photo from his expired license. It took about two months total time. I love that someone here mentioned what a blessing it is to know someone from so long ago that these things didn't matter!
Helpful Answer (2)
Report

Go ahead and request the birth certificates even if the names don't match. Starting from there, you may be able to use affidavits from them and from people who knew them when. Definitely ask the agency you're trying to get service from what they will accept. But also, definitely start the process of gathering birth certificate etc. Especially if they were born in the US to recent-immigrant parents, it's not at all uncommon for them to be using Americanized nicknames instead of their given names -- and officials are used to that.
Helpful Answer (2)
Report

My grandmother was born at home, but the family Bible had a record of it and that is what she used to get a birth certificate. My mother was also born at home in 1913, but my grandmother was still alive to sign affidavit of when she was born. See an attorney, they probably know what to do.
Helpful Answer (1)
Report

My late mom & aunt were twins without any birth records. In order to get a passport, my mother had to find a witness to her birth in this country. She used her twin, who was 15 minutes older. This doesn’t help the poster with this issue, but it’s such a novel story that gets a smile from folks, I thought I’d share it here.
Helpful Answer (4)
Report

I had a similar situation - mom was born in Quebec & all birth documents before a set date where declared nul & void because they were church issued - I was able to finally get new documents

I would say go like a geneologist would so check where they went to school [grade & high] to see if they have records, then look to birth announcements in newspapers, try the church records & go to the dioceses if church no long there, try the local historical society where they were born, if born in a hospital try there [but most were home births in those days], see if any siblings have documents & try the way they got them

Be aware that many Italian catholics [I'm assuming from the names] had many names & often also had the name of the saint whose day they were born on as a name but rarely used it - however it might come first so check the date they were born for that - my grandmother also used a different birth date all her life because she used the date of her baptism which was off by 2 days from her actual birth date [I found it in the church records]

Depending on family issues they may actually be using their 2nd or 3rd name - my friend's husband is 1 of 4 sons named Joseph & 3 daughters named Marie so they all used 2nd & 3rd names which means don't discount those records you already looked at because they were a bit looser about things then - they are often called after grandparents or aunts or uncles so then there are 2 with same name so they use a middle name

By time they started school the parents enrolled them with the name they were called NOT THEIR ACTUAL FIRST NAME - good luck - I hope I gave you some leads
Helpful Answer (2)
Report

MattyE: I wonder if either of your grandparents are sight impaired? If so, they should have a Commissioner of the Blind ID card if they are classified as "Legally Blind" or "Completely Blind." This happened to my late mother. Since she had wet Macular Degeneration and the worse case of it, she was classified as Legally Blind so she did not realize that her "For ID Purposes Only Motor Vehicle Administration card" had expired. When we needed a document notarized, they were able to use her Commissioner of Blind ID card.

You should still try to obtain a valid ID through the Vital Records even if their names don't match.
Helpful Answer (1)
Report

This question has been closed for answers. Ask a New Question.
Ask a Question
Subscribe to
Our Newsletter