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He has been there for 8mths,had some ups and downs,the nurses are very nice and call whenever something is wrong or just keep me informed if the doctor change his med or add anything. I just know it is the nurse that really know him, but should I at least talk to the doctor.

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When my Mom was in a nursing home, I made it a point to introduce myself to the nursing home doctor, and the first time we talked in length about my Mom's condition. The doctor reinforced what the nurses were saying.

I don't know how often you are able to visit, but when you see the doctor making his/her rounds, just say "hello" each time, and once the doctor recognizes who you are, he/she will stop to briefly chat with you [depending on his/her schedule].
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I used two different not affiliated. 1st was the memory care section. The nurses were great. They do & did call usually when they had time before shift change. But this one had a doctor that would sign off after the nurse administrator & nurse conferred & if he came into the facility, I never met him or saw him. If meds were needed, they had a pharmacy that would fill & deliver so the patient could usually get started quickly. They would notify me ASAP. The flu hit my parent & they got it immediately & in 5 days he was pretty good. It is very hard to explain to a dementia patient that they have to be isolated from the other residents. They did the best under the circumstances. But when I moved him there was a larger population & I was really struggling to keep my head above water. Redirecting so I understand is the old way to handle dementia patient(s). It is a broken record that they can't help & don't know their doing it. The nurses were better at coping than I. Now, my Mom is so much better but I did have to move her, have her reevaluated for PT& got her qualified again & they have extended it.The doctor that followed her was a hospital specialist from the floor where after surgery-they tried to kill her there to. You were lucky if you could catch him..he would change his schedule so you miss him. All he did was make my Mom mad. She's flipped that leaf over & is ready to go home. But before that..she would have been dead had I left her there without assistance. Some may never get to do that. I don't really know how that will work but she will now or never be alone. She will always need someone to help. Her perception of what she can do & how long its been since she did some of these things she reminds me she used to do, how much time it takes to just get herself dressed & ready to go & how long it takes her to move her body..while time is doodled away without her realizing she will be late & constantly reminded we need to get finished & going. I think I have a better idea of why there are so many OB's in the paper. Everything is simple to the doctors but they are not the one's that will ultimately be taking care of your loved one. Oh & now I am seeing all these young doctors & PA's starting out, they already need to go back to school & take classes how to listen, be more compassionate & friendly & not think everyone is doctor shopping or hopping around just to get drugs from them. Just been a few recent occurrences. I just saw "War Room" - It is really good. Have a good week.
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FF's suggestions are good. The more you introduce yourself to the staff, as well as the doctors, the more your presence is known as someone who's involved in your father's care. Eventually they get to know you. It's always been my experience that that creates a better professional relationship that benefits both the family and the individual in the facility.
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The doctors, many nurses, and other personnel change several times a year at my mother's nursing home. Even if I did go up at 7 a.m. to meet-the-doctor, he would be gone in a few months. The personnel there are very good about calling me for any ailments or medication change. If it doesn't sound dire, I thank them and tell them the doctor and nurses should do what they feel best as far as keeping mom comfortable with, say, a bad cold . If mom was at death's door, that would be different, of course, I'd be up there demanding to talk to a doctor in a flash.
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The system of having the whole nursing home staffed by a doctor group who will come there did not work well for us. Even when I would wait and wait on the day he was supposed to be in the building, he did his quick job and didn't want any questions. So, hiring a nurse who takes Mom to her usual internist or psychiatrist has been much better for us, and that same doctors group remains involved when she is admitted. Overall, much better and worth it. Since I am an MD too I just couldn't go with the other plan as they did not deliver much.
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