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Both my parents live with my husband, and I and 3 children. My dad is still very sharp at the age of 75 works part time and is in good health. My Mom has always been in good health too, but the past 6 months or so we have been noticing her Thought process not being as it used to be, She is forgetting people in her past, forgetting things she has done all her life, etc. We are in the process of obtaining a DX for her. Having some tests done next week. My concern is My mom has always handled all the financial stuff and my Dad has never had to deal with it. I think she is OK for now, but I am little concerned about what is going to happen if her condition worsens. Also would like to have a paper saying that all doctor's and such can talk with me. She gives them permission but if her mental state continues to change that may not be as easy to get from her. Just not sure what I should do? Power of Attorney? Don't know that I need that, my Dad is still very capable but just not used to doing some of these things. Any opinions would be greatly appreciated.

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cmagnum, I don't know if I'm considered co- owner on her checking, I just know I'm on it enough to write out checks from it. I guess tho I'm not because she needed to do a withdrawl from savings & she had to be with me. I couldn't do that o n my own. My BIL does her income taxes & we just have her sign it. She signs most of the checks we send out. I fill out who they are going to for her. I keep her involved to let her know that she still is in charge of her money. Thanks for your help!!!!!!!
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power of attorney and health.And financial issues. it works for me. Just so long as its not coerced into a choice of person chosen. My moms primary care dr had a form that indicated who can ask on her behalf to fill out. It's a must to have. Better to get it written up before you really need it. Sounds like your dad is doing well health wise. He would be the first contact for info. Typically with the privacy rules his name must be on a form.
Equinox
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Get a General Durable Power of Attorney. I have that for both parents. It entitles me to all health related issues and financial issues. I sign for everything for them. I do income taxes to agreeing to meds. You can download the forms yourself. Just have your parents sign in front of a notary. If you only want to be the POA for your mother for now, that is fine. If she does have dementia, it will make it easier for you and your father to make decisions about her health. Good luck.
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Forgot to tell you that after the paper is signed, sent copies to all government agencies, power company, water, etc. when you sign the check in your name, just write POA next to your name. Your parents' account will still be used to pay the bills. Don't have to open a new account.
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Durable Power of Attorney is a good idea, especially if you're geographically close & will be handling things for either of them. I agree, get it before you need it (my Mom designated hers years before she was diagnosed with dementia). In Canada, at least, you need a separate Medical Power of Attorney to be able to determine things like when to "pull the plug", should that ever be necessary. I've scanned my POA and have it ready to email or print out whenever it's needed (and it's been quite frequently). Your mother's husband has the automatic power (by virtue of marriage); he doesn't have to have a designated POA, as I understand it. For just talking to doctors and reviewing her medical info, though, I think that she could allow that in writing without giving POA. (The POA allows you to actually sign her checks, etc., too)
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Since I was not named in the healthcare surrogate, living will, or POA papers signed years ago,my sister's husband who was POA, an attorney, and I drew up HIPPA portability papers and had them notarized for me to be able to have full access to any health related issues including doctor's appts. and questioning billing, etc..My sister lived in another state before living in my home for the last year of her life. I was her caregiver 24/7 and most of the time I had no problems before the HIPPA papers were prepared. But I did run into a couple snags before they were in place.
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You don't wait to get poa you get POA so it is there when it is needed!!! Get it now from your father for both your mother and father if they allow this. If not get mom to get in and hope she has a good memory day. Someone may have better advise for the mom poa piece. Dad might be able to turn over POA to you for both of them. Don't wait. I needed POA for everything I did for my mom, esp doctors because i was the financial poa and medical poa.
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What do you do when your mom has mental health issues and her husband is "slow" ? My mom has been diagnosed with paranoid delusions so she is skeptical of everyone and doesnt even trust me, even though I am the one seeing to everything for her (and running myself ragged in the process). I just want to make sure she is safe and her money lasts as long as possible because she is not that old and has years and years left that she will need assistance. How can I safeguard her money from her husband (who steals from her) and make sure she is getting her medications etc ?
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you will need medical and financial power of attorney to act on her behalf. why you are at it it would be wise to get the same for your father. Before I got both of these, my mom had to have surgery and I took her to the surgeon, the hospital, pre surg lab work, a heart stress test with die etc. For some reason, since I was the one bringing her and scheduling everything everyone gave me information even her new pcp. Thereafter, the paper work was needed.
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do not share the poa's with anyone, there needs to be one person who makes the final decisions but DO HAVE PA backs up #1 and #2 i the event something happens to you!!!! Mom has a simple will and trust.
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