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Her dogs are her "kids" as she never married or had children. When she is taken out of her home to the new place, the dogs will be taken to be rehomed. Any advice?

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Was any effort made to try and find your sister an ALF that would allow her the dogs?
perhaps the person who will care for the dogs will take them to visit. This is a terrible loss for your sister. I realize she must need the care and the move. It does not negate the pain it will cost her.
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Reply to 97yroldmom
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Most ALF allow a pet.
Has no thought been given to this?
If you have someone with dementia so severe that you are hiding all of this from her and then transporting her suddenly without her pets, then ALF is not a correct placement. Someone that far gone would need MC.
And to be honest, the shock of the loss of these pets, if they are not rehomed with family, could well kill her.
Just my opinion as someone who has had pets all my life, and at 81 am still Fostering pets.
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Reply to AlvaDeer
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Geaton777 Apr 27, 2024
At my MILs first facility, the AL allowed 1 dog and the resident had to be able to fully care for it and keep it under control. I wish the OP would tell us why their Mom is going into facility care...
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The resident has to be able to care for their animals. Thisvis not the staffs responsibility. I can see allowing one dog but not 2. And it may depend on how big the dog is. Dogs should not be shut in one room all day. Not even a cat. Letting them roam the facility is not good either.
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Reply to JoAnn29
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This week I visited an assisted living facility. It was wonderful to see the residents going in and out with their dogs, taking them for walks on the grounds. The person at the front desk kept treats on hand, and you should have seen the wagging of tails when the dogs walked in the door and ran over to her for their treats!

My mother's assisted living had many resident pets. They were fun for all the residents. I saw notices on the bulletin board put up by outside people who came and walked the dogs for them, so I'm assuming that some of the residents weren't up to walking the dogs themselves, but the hired walkers could help.

Don't ever think you can't take pets to an AL! Many of them welcome them.
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Reply to Fawnby
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Does she have memory impairment? It will be easier to tell her a therapeutic "fib" in this case: the dogs are going to the groomers, or the vet for check-ups, etc. Anything you think she will accept.

This is a pretty drastic and sudden change for her. Does the facility have any events, like comfort pets that come visit? My MIL's facility has people that bring in specially trained dogs. At Easter my son (who raises show rabbits) brought a very docile bunny and MIL absolutely loved holding and petting it.
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Reply to Geaton777
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Find an ALF that allows pets. She might not be able to take all of them, but many places have a 'weight' limit on the 'amount' of pets allowed.

She's losing a lot, being placed against her knowledge--and I'm imagine the move will be hard on her,

Having a beloved pet to ease the shock may be just what the dr ordered.
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Reply to Midkid58
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Yellowfellow: Perhaps you can locate an AL that allows dogs. These dogs are this lady's children so some compassion should be used.
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Reply to Llamalover47
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HI Yellowfellow - I'll just add something to the message that I just left. You want advice on how to "navigate this" - you stated that your sister's dogs are her "kids"- and that she's "unaware" of the plans you made for her move to assisted living. That's a lot. Without knowing more, if you want to make this easier for her, below are my suggestions:

- Communicate with your sister in advance - get her comfortable with this transition - involve her in the process - take a visit with her to the assisted living facility in advance - the way you've arranged this behind her back will be jolting to her. It was jolting for me to read it. She's only 54.
- Her dogs are her "kids" - those feelings need to be respected and taken seriously. She should either go to an assisted living that accepts dogs or she should be able to still be in their lives. I think this needs to be handled very delicately.
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Reply to Hopeforhelp22
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This post is extremely worrying.
Why is your young sister being placed in AL without her having any say in the matter?

Surely, if your sister were not competent to make such a decision, or look after herself, then she would be placed somewhere with a higher level of care than AL.

Many AL facilities allow residents to have pets. Why isn't your sister going into such a place?

I'm worried that your sister will become extremely depressed and go into a decline if you railroad her like this.
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Reply to MiaMoor
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Many ALs allow pets, but Memory Care Assisted Living facilities do not. Since the Ops sister has Alzheimer's/dementia, she's likely going to be moved into Memory Care Assisted Living which he, as the POA, has the right to move her into for her own safety and wellbeing.

Further, the Alzheimer's association website specifically reccomends NOT discussing a move into dementia care with a loved one prior.

Below is a link to a pdf download from the Alzheimer's association about how to transition a loved one into Memory Care Assisted Living. Using fibs and medication is recommended, along with making no mention of the move beforehand. Have a look:

https://www.google.com/url?sa=t&source=web&rct=j&opi=89978449&url=https://www.alz.org/media/cacentral/documents/professional-care-22-successful-move-to-dementia-care.pdf&ved=2ahUKEwjLzrDD7oWGAxVwADQIHeNoDUYQFnoECA8QBg&usg=AOvVaw0f7K5HM3ofRjBWjjxNXyVo

Yellowfellow, I'm so sorry you and your sister are faced with this situation which neither of you are happy about, I'm sure. Some things are just not fixable, especially when dementia is at play. We're often forced to pick the least of the bad options, unfortunately. I'm sure you're stressed out about this. Have you thought about getting her an Alzheimer's dog? No, of course it's not a real dog, but many people love them. Baby dolls also.

I wish you good luck and Godspeed moving forward.
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Reply to lealonnie1
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