My mother is 95yrs old, I quit my job to stay home and care for her. I love my mother very much , but sometimes I feel so invisible. I have 4 older brother's. 2 live by us, and 2 live in other states. 1 of my brothers come by when its convenient, but it's usually just me and mom. When anything is brought up in conversation about my brothers, she can tell you every detail, but she doesn't seem to remember things that I've done, gifts I've given to her, trips we've taken together.
She has never been diagnosed with dementia or anything like it.
It hurts to know that she has no memories of me. Good or bad. When I bring any past memories of us into a conversation, she thinks I'm making it up. When she sees pictures, she looks at them and says " Now when was this taken" or I remember this trip, but I don't remember you being there."
We can have a conversation today but tomorrow she will swear she never said anything I repeat back to her. She's called my brothers and told them I'm putting words in her mouth and she thinks I'm trying to make her think she's losing her mind.
I'm here with her 24/7 and get no help from anyone, no days off, no one to sit with her so I might get a few minutes for myself. I have no income so I'm relying on her for financial support. She has visitors daily and I'm looked upon as hired help. She has me waiting on them hand and foot.
But this doesn't compare to all that she's done for me, so I keep my feelings to myself and suck it up.
But her not remembering me or anything we've done together is really tearing me apart. I thought we were so much closer in life than what it seems. We've talked and shared secrets and stories and now she knows who I am, she knows I'm her daughter, she just has no stories to tell, no memories to share.
I know there's probably nothing I can do about it, I guess I just needed to get this off of my chest, or out of my head. Thank you for letting me vent.
But any suggestions or solutions would be greatly appreciated.
Thank You. and