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She has dementia. And a few weeks ago she wouldn’t open doors, or would choke on solid food. And now? She is more lucid? Is this normal?
it’s honestly been so annoying to take care of her and seeing her get better instead of worst is disheartening. I keep hoping she’ll die and she improves?

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Dementia behaviors and symptoms are not linear; in other words, they have good days & bad days. When I'd visit my mother at her Memory Care ALF, there were times I'd say OMG, she looks and acts GREAT, she's doing so much better it's crazy! The next week, she was doing horribly and acting like she was dying.

In reality, no elder suffering from dementia ever get's better; they only continue to decline and to take steps 'down' on a regular basis. You may see your mother having good days from time to time, but she's not 'getting better' from a dementia standpoint. Tomorrow you may see her acting totally incoherent and be scratching your head wondering how you ever thought for ONE moment that she was getting better.

I suggest you read this 33 page booklet ( a free download) which has THE best information ever about managing dementia and what to expect with an elder who's been diagnosed with it.

Understanding the Dementia Experience, by Jennifer Ghent-Fuller 
https://www.smashwords.com/books/view/210580

Jennifer is a nurse who worked for many years as an educator and counsellor for people with dementia and their families, as well as others in caring roles. She addresses the emotional and grief issues in the contexts in which they arise for families living with dementia.

The full copy of her book is available here:
https://www.amazon.com/Thoughtful-Dementia-Care-Understanding-Experience/dp/B09WN439CC/ref=sr_1_2?crid=2E7WWE9X5UFXR&keywords=jennifer+ghent+fuller+books&qid=1657468364&sprefix=jennifer+ghent%2Caps%2C631&sr=8-2

This booklet may give you a better understanding of what dementia looks like, as a big picture, and help you see what mom is going through.

If you feel burned out, perhaps it's time to look into Memory Care Assisted Living for your mom. If the funds aren't available, look into Skilled Nursing with Medicaid to fund her long term care there.

Best of luck to you.
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It's a real roller coaster! I feel the same about my mom sometimes. Some days she really surprises me with her being spot on about things. It really blows my mind some days. Then not long after, she does or says something crazy again. Dementia is so bizarre.
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If I saw and learned anything during the journey with both my parents and their aging and health issues, it was that their situations would lurch forward, backward, and sideways. Just when I got convinced it was going one way, it would change, and yes, sometimes for the better. Enjoy those times, they invariably don’t stay. The one constant is change
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I don't know anything about your previous relationship with your mother so this isn't meant to be judgmental, but I advise that anyone hoping for their care recipient to die should place them in a facility - for her sake as well as yours.
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I have to agree with cwillie, in that if your mother is "annoying" you and you wish she would die, it is probably best that for both your sakes that you place her in a memory care facility, where she will receive the care she needs and you can just visit when and if you want.
Folks with Alzheimer's/dementia can live from 5-20 years, so if you're not prepared for the long haul with her care, do you both a favor and place her.
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lilmelba,
i think daniLV is just exhausted. i love my mom but sometimes i feel the same way. caregiving and then burnout is traumatic and can leave us with feelings about the person and experience we never dreamed we would have. dont be too harsh. she will rebound but right now she is feeling exhausted, im sure.
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This is an older post, so hopefully you are coping better these days. It does sound like you may have reached your caregiving saturation point. Time to take steps to place mom in a facility.

Good luck to you.
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