In her condition [ stroke left side] she has asphasia, weak on left side, and a fall risk. She is still confused and doesn't seem to realize she needs to get as much rehabilitation as possible. The hospital called and states that she is going against doctors orders and won't stay in bed... states that she is leaving.
What is your take on this? Isn't their job to watch her? I mean she's going to be in a wheelchair and eat through a feeding tube the rest of her life if she goes home now.
According to your profile, your mother is 54 years old!!!!! At such a young age, she'll need rehab to get back on her feet after she's released from the hospital. It's crucial that she's sent for rehab to a facility that can effectively manage her and help her with PT and OT to where she can lead a productive life after she's released. Speak to the hospitalist and her doctor about which rehab facility would be best for your mom, and go from there.
If she's sent to a Skilled Nursing Facility for rehab and doesn't make progress and get back to where she can function on her own again, she can stay in their long term care wing permanently and you can apply for Medicaid to finance it. So that's something else to consider, not knowing how things will turn out given the severity of her stroke.
I'm sorry you're all going through such a stressful situation and I will pray for the best possible outcome for her. Sending you a hug.
Be careful not to enable her making decisions that will hurt her long term, like helping her to come home before everything that’s possible has been done to help her recover.
But also realize that her mind may not be able to grasp the situation.
Hospitals can’t restrain a patient and they don’t have the staff to sit with them one on one.
I would try to have a family member with her during this difficult yet crucial time to encourage her to do the therapy.
As you said, her future depends on it and if you are likely to be her advocate a large portion of your future depends on it as well.
She may have vascular dementia, the stroke is part of the disease.
Being in a hospital also adds to confusion, so much so that there is a recognized condition called Hospital Delirium. The severity can vary.
If she will be released to go to rehab try to locate a rehab that also has a wing or floor for Memory Care. Logically PT and OT that work more often with patients that have dementia have better ways to deal with the problems that come with that. Not participating.
If you can not care for her if she remains in a wheelchair and or has a feeding tube you need to discuss now with a Social Worker that she will not be safe at home and you can not care for her. They can start the process of looking for a facility that will be appropriate. Either Memory Care of Skilled Nursing. Most likely Skilled Nursing as most Memory Care facilities will not accept a patient with any "tubes" feeding, IV's, catheters....
As well as the visible symptoms of asphasia & limb weakness, the invisible injury is to her brain. So confusion, changes in thinking, changes in emotions & impairment sadly are often present too.
Move your focus from trying to reason with your Mother or convincing her of the facts just now. Focus on being her advocate to get the care & rehab she needs & to increase supervision & safety.