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So my mother and 2 sisters plotted and planned behind my fathers back to place him in a Nursing Home. Two days ago they dropped him off and left. He is miserable and just wants to go home!! My mother does not want him, she already has plans to remodel and trade cars so he can be there on Medicare. Not once was he ever asked what he wanted or how he felt, or was able to look at options. I talked to him today and he said “there is nothing to do here, I go and eat and come back to my room and sleep!” The reason they said he need to go was to socialize. My question is this: she has POA, what do I need to do in order to get him out of there and have him live with me?? I do not care about anything but his well-being. I do not want ANY MONEY etc..


Any and all help would be greatly appreciated. Is it possible for him to make me POA? I also read about being a guardian? I just want him out of there and with me do I know he is safe and loved.

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If your father is competent legally, then he can change POA or just leave the SNF. POA is NOT guardianship.
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jchurch87 Oct 2019
So can I go there with an attorney and have a new one drawn up naming me as new POA and get him out right then and there??
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What led to your dad being admitted to a NH? You can't just drop someone off, they have to have a medical necessity to be admitted. I ask because everyone wants to leave the facility, but sometimes it is in their best interests to be there.

If your mom is counting on Medicare to pay the bill she is in for a shock. Medicare doesn't pay for NH.

As rovana said as long as your dad is competent he is free to leave, they are not prisons.

Please speak with the facility before you do anything, he could be in need of nursing or other care that you might be unaware of.

I hope that the best thing for your dad is the outcome.
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Why would you not have been consulted before your father was placed in long term care, if you wanted him to come live with you? That makes no sense to me.

Like Rovana said, if your father is legally competent, he can walk out of the SNF and live wherever he'd like. If he's not competent, that's another matter entirely and one you're not likely qualified to deal with long term, in your home.

There is probably a lot more going on then you are aware of. An elder cannot be admitted to a nursing home to "socialize"......a doctor has to verify he's in need of help for most activities of daily living before he can even be considered. Medicare doesn't pay for SNFs.....Medicaid does, only when the elder has no significant income or assets, and after it's been deemed necessary by medical doctors.

Bestbof luck to you
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If he's legally competent, sure he can change his POA.

I might suggest spending 24 hours in the NH with dad and seeing exactly what he needs done for him.

Is this story about your mother and sisters plotting come from Dad? Have you heard mom's version of the story? Talked to dad's doctors about his infirmities and strengths? Who told you about Medicare paying? Does that come from dad?

When was the last time you went to a medical appointment t with dad? What medications is he on? Is he compliant with his meds and diet? Does he wander? Does he sundown?

These are a couple of the questions you might consider asking before you decide to take on Dad's care.
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If he’s competent, he can leave the facility and go where he wants, when he wants. POA has nothing to do with leaving. He can change his POA any time.
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