Follow
Share

When my mother moved in with me over 4 years ago, some luggage from a set came along and was stored in the top of her closet. We didn't need the large or small roller bags until this summer when Mom spent 10 days with her sister. When I opened the small bag there were 2 cans of coffee in it. Mom needed to store some things in "hidden" places because as my father's vascular dementia worsened, he would go into the pantry and throw things away (because he thought there was too much) or tell my mother she didn't need any grocery money that month because there was so much food in the pantry and freezer. Before his dementia, Dad has never said anything about how Mom managed the kitchen and afterwards he couldn't understand Mom purchased most grocery basics on sale or that a freezer is always full in late fall with the food put up over the summer. Mom stopped growing gardens at age 78 but we still purchased produce from local farms to can and freeze. There's nothing like the taste of vine ripen strawberries or corn gathered and frozen the same day.


The best used by date on that coffee is 2 years in the past and logically I should just pitch that $20 of coffee right? As Mom (oldest daughter raised during the Depression) taught me, I hate "wasting" anything and particularly groceries. Those coffee cans have been sitting in my kitchen now for over a month and I found myself searching online this morning for how long coffee can last in the unopened can...


Anyone else have similar issues? Or am I a special nut case?

This question has been closed for answers. Ask a New Question.
A bit of a nut case but I think not alone in the jar. I think there’s a bunch of us - children of children who were scarred by The Great Depression.

My mother was terrified of being poor again. She would come to tears telling my brothers and me stories of what it was like - growing up poor during the 1930’s.

As a result, my mom - both my parents really - were frugal. My mom - beyond frugal. I always said my mom didn’t just pinch pennies- she made them scream.

You know how you take a bottle of shampoo or lotion and turn it upside down to get the last little bit? HA! That was for amateurs. My mother had a sturdy pair of scissors and she would cut the bottles in half - then she would use a tiny little rubber spatula and scrape away until every last drop was gone. Mom could get an extra week out of just about anything!

Im not as bad as that but I’d wager I can get more toothpaste out of a tube than most folks - that’s for sure! And, I do turn my bottles upside down but I draw the line at cutting them open.

I do adhere to food expiration dates, however. Rainman has a really sensitive tummy and I’ve had one too many cases of food poisoning to mess around with that.

I have read that “Use By” and “Best By” mean exactly that. So, I’d imagine that the coffee won’t kill you if you decide to drink it - it just probably won’t taste very good.
Helpful Answer (6)
Report
freqflyer Sep 2019
Welcome to the good to the last drop club :) I do the same with bottles of anything, same with toothpaste. Always used Vo5 shampoo as for $1 it worked just as well as those $4 shampoos. I get every drop out of liquid detergent. It's like a game to me.

I also refuse to use anything after "Use By" or "Best By". Sig Other is always asking me to do the "sniff test" on lettuce, good grief can't he smell that the lettuce needs to be discarded.... [sigh].

TNtechie, find another use for that old coffee instead of drinking it. Like putting the ground coffee into your garden. Or use as an air fresher.
(7)
Report
See 4 more replies
A couple thoughts on the coffee.

It is a best before date, not a spoiled after date. It is unlikely the coffee would go rancid, but it may have lost flavour. When we had a 90th birthday party for Dad earlier this year, I found an upopened tin of coffee. It was bought in 2015. I needed coffee for the party. I used it, added a bit extra per pot and a smidge of cinnamon it was fine.

How long would it take you to use up the two cans? If you will not use it up by the end of the year, ask a local church if they can use it, or a soup kitchen.

Here the food bank will take food with a best before date within the last 2 years.
Helpful Answer (8)
Report
TNtechie Sep 2019
Thank you! Just called the local senior center and confirmed they would be happy to take the coffee. Now I can let it go because it will be put to a good use.
(13)
Report
I'm puttering around going through some things and purging stuff lately and I have the same problem.... so that box of jello expired 5 years ago, but does jello ever really expire? 🤣
I think in the case of the coffee there may be more to it because it is a powerful connection to your parents, and at some deep level letting go of the coffee is letting go of a physical connection to the past. If you're not ready then just set it aside until you are. Or just open it and give it a try, all you have to lose is a pot of coffee, right?
Helpful Answer (9)
Report
TNtechie Sep 2019
You are probably right. The last year has had some major changes; Dad died 6 months ago and Mom's health has declined significantly following a fall here in the house. Emotionally I don't want to toss the coffee in the trash even though it's too old.
(6)
Report
Big hugs.

I have two first aid kits in my bathroom cabinet.

[which reminds me: Daughter 1, a couple of years back, came downstairs and demanded "WHY is there an IV giving set in the bathroom cupboard?" I remembered that Mother had travelled to Namibia at some point and travellers at the time were advised to take sterile equipment with them for fear of poor practices in certain countries. We must have kept it... in case].

Anyway, so that one was duly returned to a safe clinical disposal unit at D1's hospital; but the first aid kits are still there. I do not travel. I wouldn't go out of the house if I could avoid it, to be honest. And besides they must be museum pieces by now - they've probably got gutta percha and gentian violet in them.

But. But.

Oh nuts to it I'll go and throw them away!

The coffee's probably fine, just not something to serve to your dinner guests.
Helpful Answer (10)
Report
freqflyer Sep 2019
Countymouse, speaking of old first aid kits. Not long ago I peeked inside the first aid kit we have here in the office, I don't think it had been opened since the 1990's. Who would think band-aids would dry out :P
(7)
Report
See 1 more reply
Funny thing is I do not want to drink that coffee. I purchased a new package of my favorite coffee last week and opened it this morning. Sitting here right now drinking a cup from a fresh pot of my "new" coffee. But I still didn't throw the old stuff away either. :>)
Helpful Answer (5)
Report
NYDaughterInLaw Sep 2019
Make the entire can of coffee. Once cooled, coffee grounds are great fertilizer for lawns, trees, and shrubs.
(0)
Report
I love this story. I am in for testing that coffee!
Helpful Answer (8)
Report

Techie, you can always make coffee and put the grounds in your garden (I've never used uncooked grounds; not sure how they'd work).    I've even tried specialty coffees to give my worms a taste of Martha Stewart type gardening.  I've given them Hazelnut coffee occasionally.  

I don't think the worms would mind that your coffee is 2 years old.

I experience a similar issue, and I make no apologies for  it.  "Things" often develop special meaning, and also can connect us not only to our family, here or gone, but also to special times.

Thumbing through a women's clothing catalogue yesterday, I had a "deja vu" moment when I saw a yellow dress with designs (I don't remember which now).   Suddenly I envisioned myself as a toddler, wearing whatever was a kind of jumper - pants with a bib.   I don't know if that's what the material actually resembled, but it created a real flashback moment.    So, obviously, I clipped that photo from the catalogue and saved it.

Tap shoes and ballet slippers have the same effect.  I flash back to a lovely old Victorian house, to a room with wooden floors where we changed to get ready for class.   

Items can be associated with such intriguing and comforting memories.  I'll keep them as long as the memories appear and are inspiring, and comforting.

As I'm going through my father's possessions, I came across a letter my mother wrote when I was one month old.  It was so overwhelmingly emotional and inspirational that I was in tears by the time I finished reading it.   I'll never part with it. 

I'm hoping to find Dad's parachute; I remember it as being a yellowish orange silk, when last I saw it some decades ago.  Hopefully it's still hiding in some of the boxes I'll be going through. 

There will come a time when it naturally will feel right to discard items, even old coffee.   I think, especially given the turmoil these days, that we all need something to comfort us, and if your mother's coffee can do that, save it.
Helpful Answer (10)
Report
susiemen Sep 2019
Loved the comment, "I clipped that photo from the catalogue and saved it." I have hundreds of folders full of a variety of subjects in newsprint, magazine articles, etc.--environmental, religious, political, handicrafts, educational, LGBT, friends' obituaries, etc. Amazingly, somehow my brain at 78 still finds what I am looking for if I want to use it in a current discussion.
(2)
Report
Drink it or pitch it. Nothing is wasted. I figure since it was paid for, how I use it should my choice.

While downsizing, I found it liberating to just throw out an unwanted, random can, jar, frozen item, etc. and not feel guilty.
Helpful Answer (5)
Report

I don't believe in expiration dates, per se. I do believe expiration dates are put on items so we DO throw them out and buy new ones, for no good reason. That said, if something is seriously old, of course throw it out. But coffee? Try it first.........what's the worst that can happen? It tastes yucky & THEN you toss it, right? But..........here's another cool tip for coffee grinds: they get rid of very strong odors on clothing or handbags! Simply place the smelly items in a garment bag with a can of coffee grinds in the bottom, zip up the bag, leave it alone for a week and voila, the odor is gone!
Helpful Answer (5)
Report

Here you go... problem solved for that coffee. And by the way, I have some I should toss, too...but now I don't have too.
https://www.google.com/search?
Uses for old coffee
q=us3s+for+old+coffee&oq=us3s+for+old+coffee&aqs=chrome..69i57j0l3.6755j0j8&client=tablet-android-samsung&sourceid=chrome-mobile&ie=UTF-8
Helpful Answer (2)
Report

I am guessing the cans have never been opened correct?
If they are sealed, the cans intact with no rust or bulging tops then my guess is the coffee is still good. Only way to tell is open a can and smell it. If it smells like coffee use it. If it smells rancid or "off" then compost it.
By the way the dates are NOT expiration dates but "use by", "best by", "freshest by" . Pretty much the ONLY food that is required to be pulled from a grocery shelf on the date is baby formula.
Helpful Answer (5)
Report

I love all the responses. I would never have that problem. 5 coffee drinkers in my house! Can't keep it from running out! Needless to say I would use it even if ten years old and unopened! ☺👭
Helpful Answer (3)
Report

If you happen to be a watercolor artist, you might try painting monotone with coffee to use it up . But two cans of coffee would turn into an awful lot of painting! LOL
Helpful Answer (1)
Report

If you garden, put it in the compost heap or bury grounds around your plants. You can feel good that your are using them for something beneficial.

Saving and using items is frugal - a laudable trait.
Saving things until they go bad or create chaos is hoarding - a problem that needs to be curbed.
As I write this, I am going through books and donating the ones I never read. So, you can see that saving versus hoarding is something we all deal with.
Helpful Answer (5)
Report

When my mom died at age 80 (and I am fast approaching 82 myself) I found her refrigerator stuffed with moldy food containers, and the canned goods in the panty were exploding! She came of age during the depression, and then there was WWII when many food items and gasoline were rationed--she never threw anything out! (I was a child but remember our household during WWII). But maybe because of what she left in her home after she died, I make it a point to clean out my frig twice a year and inspect the pantry for things I won't use (some can be given away during Senior Center Thanksgiving basket collection).
My late husband had vascular dementia and could only see the food at front of frig and pantry for some reason. Strange things happen as we age--I'm sure I must be exhibiting early signs of Alzheimer's myself as I carry one copy of late onset gene--and it is now late!
Helpful Answer (3)
Report
GraceNBCC Sep 2019
Prayers for you Arleeda!
(1)
Report
Ooh Open it up and try it! If it is not good at least you can say to yourself you tried! Our family has a western store that has been here since 1881. I bet we have 7 tubes of Neosporin and old band-aids that are like 7 years old. I used some lidocaine yesterday that was 9 treats old and it stopped the itch lol! Thrifty bunch we are. That's why the store is 138 years old haha! But all good things come to an end. No regrets people. Try the old coffee!
Helpful Answer (4)
Report
GraceNBCC Sep 2019
I remember visiting my grandparents and them offering us a beer. Grandpa stopped drinking years long ago and kept some in the cellar for guests. It was sealed but full of white fuzz!! I changed my mind. My husband pretended to take some sips, then wanted to take a walk outside, where he slowly poured out the beer. 'Finishing it off' as he returned.
NiNice to have a store and storage room! When I had to downsize I SPENT money renting a trailer to take stuff to Goodwill. No charity would pick up clothes or shoes, no one had free time for their truck available before my closing. I wasted a lot of valuable time trying to get resale shops, estate sales, and even charities to help. So I ended up moving it to another state and renting 2 storage units...10×20 each. My helpers would have to drive 7 hours round trip to help me now, so not an option.
My Grandfather started losing his sight. Since it was gradual, he didn't see..or maybe didn't look...mold on food in containers in the fridge. Eventually the frig was moldy! They didn't entertain anymore. Any guests we served, not allowed to help in the kitchen, etc. They kept getting bad cases of the Intestinal Flu...it was good poisoning. Grandma had to be hospitalized twice.
Please heed these cautionary tales.
(1)
Report
I had such a laugh reading TNtechie's post! Oh, yes--I'm sure there are many of us daughters whose hoarding tendencies were created living with mothers who couldn't bear throwing ANYTHING away! In my case, My mother, born in 1908 and passing away in 2012, continued to be a great influence and admonisher in my life. She lived with us for 23 years and then went to assisted for the last 6 years. One of her penchants for hoarding was 24 ounce cottage cheese cartons. We had a garden every summer and she would boil down all the tomatoes and make sauce which we stored in those cartons in her freezer down in the basement. I once fixed myself a salad of iceberg lettuce, tossing a couple of rusted leaf stems into the compost bowl. When she saw these, she admonished me for "throwing away this good lettuce!" Then she stood there and ate them. Her compunction for buying in excess when things were on sale has led me to have canned and packaged goods in my pantry which are dated 2010 and even earlier. I just go ahead and use them, and so far haven't gotten sick, but I also have tubes of toothpaste, deodorants, etc. which are outdated, but bought because they were a good sale price. I think the main problem I inherited from my mother's concerns born in the Great Depression was the inability to monitor and moderate. In her case, it led to most of her life being markedly obese (which didn't, however, seem to affect her health) because of overbuying of sale food and then feeling guilt if not eating it up. We moved to a new city when she was 100 years old, and brought her along to an assisted place just 4 miles from our home. The main concern she was having with the move was to have me assure her that I wouldn't throw out or recycle all those cottage cheese cartons! We have no yard or garden at our new home, so I did bring along 20 of them, which will probably be used for something someday...my house is full of stuff that I look at and suddenly think, "I may need that someday." As a consequence I will probably leave my daughters a real chore when I pass. However, the younger one says, "Oh, don't worry about it Mom--when you're gone, we'll just haul it all over to Goodwill!" As a final tip on coffee--keep it in the freezer to preserve freshness!
Helpful Answer (3)
Report

I say open the can and use it. Coffee is vacuum packed and unless there is rust or a dent in the can, it should be good.

This is funny because I still have to put aside thoughts before I toss things that my grandmother religiously recycled...and she could find a use for about everything. I now use coffee cans and dirty zip lock bags to put scraps of food or bones in, freeze them, and then put in the trash on garbage day. No smell and no flies around the garbage cans. And dogs don't smell it before it's picked up either.
Helpful Answer (8)
Report
TNtechie Sep 2019
I put the scraps that are not dog appropriate into used zip lock bags or plastic grocery bags and ice cream containers as available before placing in the trash and making sure I tie the trash bag tightly closed too. Dogs don't get into my trash but a family of bears will if they smell something good. Fortunately, the neighbors are not as careful so the bears usually get into their trash and not mine!
(5)
Report
If you’re a nut case, then we’re all nut cases! 🙂
Helpful Answer (6)
Report

Just let it go. Coffee is good for years after date
Helpful Answer (2)
Report

Coffee grounds have oil in them and will probably become rancid over 2 years but the only way to find out is to open it! In my family I'm famous for eating expired stuff and scraping off mold in order to eat something and not waste it. I ate some rancid mayo the other day (by accident) and I'm still alive. We Americans waste too much food. My mom grew up on the edge of the Depression and I grew up hearing daily about the famine in Biafra (Ethiopia?) and seeing pictures of emaciated children and people. Plus I grew up Catholic. A perfect storm of guilt. If there are 2 peas leftover i will save them and put them in the next meal. Open the coffee and let us know! We should have a reveal party! :-)
Helpful Answer (7)
Report
jacobsonbob Sep 2019
FWIW Biafra was in West Africa, and was a part of Nigeria that was independent for almost 3 years in the late 1960s, and is now back in Nigeria. Eritrea is what separated from Ethiopia and is (still) a separate nation, gaining independence in 1993 after various struggles over several decades.
(2)
Report
No, anyone, regardless of parentage, LOL, does not want to waste as it has repercussions for the environment/landfills, budgets...the whole thing. I kind of went through this when we reached the point of accepting mom had not cooked in over a year and it was time to go through the cupboards and see what was going on up there. There also were some tiny bugs that were annoying me, and sure enough, inside a dry pasta box was the source. So no trouble knowing that had to go. There was just an interesting article on line somewhere about how confusing the statements on products were to consumers and how much food is wasted when it might still be fine. So for Best By...it might drop in quality. I tried using an older baking mix and things didn't rise as they should so I learned my lesson. I went through the spice racks and found some that were not fresh...they say if you can't smell them, they're probably no good. Coffee I think has some oil to it, so that could go rancid,,but if an airtight seal...maybe not? I'd connect with the manufacturer...if you're lucky they'll send you some coupons to help alleviate your guilt:-) as a good will gesture. Otherwise I stick with when in doubt, throw it out and aim to pay more attention in the future. We do so much for others we can be kind to ourselves and get fresh, don't you think?
Helpful Answer (4)
Report

There was just a new "thing" put out to the public about how much "past stamped date" products have been found to still be valid.
Helpful Answer (1)
Report

Use the grounds around the perimeter of your home. It repels ants, beetles,fleas, and a few others. Squirrels also don't like the smell of it. Just sprinkle close to your house near the foundation. Either that or mix into your garden soil when you get ready to turn it this fall. One way to avoid feeling bad about getting rid of it.
Helpful Answer (3)
Report

Working as a volunteer at a food bank that gets a lot of donations from the public and especially homes of the elderly who have been placed in NHs, we were required to have at least one person with the knowledge regarding sanitation, how to decide if a dated item was still good for use, etc.
We found that canned foods with a Best By date were usually good for at least another 6-7 years! Cans with a small dent in the sides were ok IF the dent didn't extend to the rim. Rice has virtually no expiration date and can be frozen to keep weevils and moths out of it. Pasta also will last months past a Best By date. Again, it needs to be sealed and checked for bugs. Meats are harder to check. Freezer burn can ruin the taste but, it can be trimmed off. Fat will go rancid even frozen. I use a vacumn sealer and I have meats from 2016 that are as good as the day I bought them. Fresh vegies can be perked up with ice water. Mold on cheese can be cut away and stale bread is perfect for toasting. Home canned goods will show a lot of bubbles and rust on the lids when they are bad as will store bought cans. So home canned foods last for 6 - 7 years also.

The coffee should still be good.
Helpful Answer (8)
Report

Dear TNtechie,
Such values are common amongst people who grew up during the Depression and WWII, also those who grew up 'dirt poor'. This leads to hoarding and food poisoning all to often, especially with age or illness.
You are ahead of the game as thou have identified your demon and recognize it as beyond the norm. You also know where you got that thinking from.
So, if possible, don't trash it. Coffee grounds are great for gardens. If you personally can't use it for composting or around plants, donate it to someone who can.
As a general rule, start donating to various organizations. Ones your Mom may have a connection to might be best to start.
See if you can find a neighbor, group, or organization that composted. They can take a lot and will know to toss things like canned goods that might have lead leaches from the seal, or botulism.
Nicer things can go to a resale shop...like dress clothes, old costumes, holiday decor, etc.
Next level is Goodwill, Salvation Army, Church Mission, etc.
The advantage is two fold. It is not being wasted! You are sharing it with those in greater need...being your brothers keeper. It is being put to good use...and if it goes to resale you get $ for it, charity a tax deduction. (Odds are she no longer benefits from itemizing, but she is likely unaware. Also you can donate in the name of someone who would benefit.)
Next Charities or Food Banks will sort out items that are unsafe. They generally have guidelines on how long the shelf life is beyond the Use By Expiration, or Best By Dates. This takes the safety issue out of your hands.
Start small...the bag with Coffee. Gradually make it part of the routine.
Organize the cupboards as space opens up and move things to the front...like the stores do. Also the extra air space in the frig & freezer will allow better air circulation, using less electricity. It will also allow her space to take advantage of sales, fresh food from farm stands, or the bumper crop from neighbors gardens. I never grow zucchini or tomatoes because there is always someone giving away their extras so they won't spoil.
You will start to feel better as you reduce, reuse and share. As you make this a habit, you will not have so much expired food, etc.
If you have to move or downsize, you will be glad you have done this. It will save a lot of work and money. Remember your time is valuable!
Helpful Answer (1)
Report

You’re not the only one. I’m not quite a hoarder, but I am a packrat. I have a twice-monthly housekeeper helping me get rid of nonfood items I’ve hung onto for no reason I can articulate except possibly “But then I won’t have it anymore if I need it!” 🙄 She donates a lot of it to her church, and takes it away, and that is an enormous help. I have yet to regret letting her take my “stuff,” but sometimes we still need to negotiate. (“But my first boyfriend gave me that!”)

I keep some just-past-prime canned foods if they’re vacuum-sealed. I just cleaned out my freezer to get rid of a few freezerburned/old items, but frozen veggies last a long time.

The coffee is probably good. Next time you’re ready to start a new can, open one of your mom’s and take a sniff. If it’s rancid, it should smell rancid. If it’s not, stick it in the freezer and use as needed. You can give the other can to a food bank.
Helpful Answer (2)
Report

I'll bet the coffee is okay - it may be a bit stale - many best before dates mean they can't sell after it but some are so that the stores get new stock from the wholesaler/factory - check on line
Helpful Answer (1)
Report

I don't consider myself to be a penny pincher and I would not throw away the coffee! LOL  If it's an unopened can, it will more than likely be just fine.

You've heard that expression that "we all become our parents" at some point...
Helpful Answer (3)
Report

Oh no you are definitely not alone in this. My mother has a shed and I am talking a storage unit, 10 x 16 full of clothes she purchased over the years.and refuses to get rid of them. She accuses me of stealing her clothes which are really mine. She “had” bottled water that she hung onto for years, I tossed it. She hangs onto buttons from her depends. She hoarders anything and everything.
Helpful Answer (1)
Report

This question has been closed for answers. Ask a New Question.
Ask a Question
Subscribe to
Our Newsletter