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And have taken care of alot of hospice clients in my career. My mom is 97 she has her mind can walk some but is in a lot of pain. A member of the family has taken it upon themselves to get hospice care, I must say my mother has agreed. My question is should she be put in bed and be given strong meds for her pain and slowly watch her die. I guess that’s how I’m looking at it right now.

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If this relative had mom's permission to put her on hospice--and legally she was deemed to be OK, mentally, then there's not a lot you can do to stop it. Is that what you do NOT want? Because, maybe mom is ready to call it a day, so to speak.

Hospice does not mean the same thing to each individual patient. They don't come in, slap the patient in bed and hand out the drugs--it's a process. My FIL, on hospice, was in the hospital, but encouraged to do whatever he felt like doing on any given day.

Yes, hospice does aid in the EOL cacre, and yes, to a degree it IS slowly watching someone die, but at 97? your mom is dying right in front of you anyway. Hospice will simply make that process much less painful and give her some dignity.

If you work in healthcare with the elderly, you would know all this.
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So you are okay with watching your 97 year old mother suffer in pain?
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My mother was on hospice for almost eight months, and nothing changed in her life until about three weeks before she died when she became bedridden out of necessity. She still had her regular medications, got up and dressed every morning, and life was pretty mundane. The only difference is she had a hospice nurse visiting and treating what needed to be dealt with because we'd decided we were done with hospitals.

I think you need to talk to the social worker with the hospice company and learn what hospice is about. You don't seem to be informed about it at all.
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