This is caregiver no. 7 in 2 years. She is new. Mom washes herself with disposable cloths. The last caretaker let her do this, some days she does not want to get dressed. If she is forced to do these things she gets nasty. She calls me many times during the day at work to complain. Today I decided I cannot answer all the time because she started at 9:30 am. I told caretaker to let her do her own thing for now. She has always been used to getting her way. I have a brother out of state and she will not bother him. Any suggestions? She is 90 and dementia but very stubborn and aware.
My Dad was very shy around his private caregiver and he rather forgo a shower. After a couple of days, the caregiver put her hands on her hips and said in a stern voice "Mr. Bob, I raised a houseful of boys, there isn't anything I haven't seen".... that got Dad laughing, and the caregiver was able to get him into the shower :)
So some tough love and a sense of humor sometimes work.... or not.