Your mom is probably very tired. It’s hard to keep going when our bodies are old and worn out. When my mom had fractures in her back, she said she didn’t hurt unless she moved. Well she had to move and had to take pain meds in order to move but she wanted to. She knew she had to do the therapy that was required. She recovered from the fall and lived several more years but it was very hard.
Her last trip to the hospital with CHF was one too many. She was too worn out to be going through all of that again. I regret I didn’t listen to her trying to tell me she wanted to stop. It was hard work just to stay alive.
Be careful that she doesn’t get aspiration pneumonia since she doesn’t want to eat. She may need a swallow test.
Do your mom a favor and read the book “Being Mortal, Medicine and what matters in the end” by Atul Gawande. Your mom may heal and get better from this incident but just know it’s easy for us as caretakers to get so focused on keeping them alive that we lose sight of their quality of life.
If your mother has 'no will to go on' and doesn't want to eat, her body is winding down for death. It is probably best to change the way you have tried to help her in the past, and instead support her and your family members for the coming end. Best wishes.
The simple answer is that you can’t “battle it”. Nor should you try. Is she on Hospice? If not, check with her doctor or nurse for suggestions. I’m sure she’s on painkillers that will make her sleep and probably kill her appetite as well.
The best way way to handle this is with grace and calm acceptance. You can’t fight the inevitable. Spend as much time with her as you can. When she’s awake, tell her you love her and that she’s a great mom. It will make it easier on both of you.
When my mom had fractures in her back, she said she didn’t hurt unless she moved.
Well she had to move and had to take pain meds in order to move but she wanted to. She knew she had to do the therapy that was required. She recovered from the fall and lived several more years but it was very hard.
Her last trip to the hospital with CHF was one too many. She was too worn out to be going through all of that again. I regret I didn’t listen to her trying to tell me she wanted to stop. It was hard work just to stay alive.
Be careful that she doesn’t get aspiration pneumonia since she doesn’t want to eat. She may need a swallow test.
Do your mom a favor and read the book “Being Mortal, Medicine and what matters in the end” by Atul Gawande.
Your mom may heal and get better from this incident but just know it’s easy for us as caretakers to get so focused on keeping them alive that we lose sight of their quality of life.
I agree about considering having her evaluated for Hospice. If she qualifies, they can help address pain and other needs she may have.
The best way way to handle this is with grace and calm acceptance. You can’t fight the inevitable. Spend as much time with her as you can. When she’s awake, tell her you love her and that she’s a great mom. It will make it easier on both of you.