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My 70 yr old younger sister has had memory problems due to epilepsy most of her life. Dad & Mom are gone and her care has been left to me. She has been living alone for decades, doing ok as long as someone, now me, watches over & takes care of everything. But now she is noticeably declining and needs to be in a nursing home. I'm trying to figure out how to do that. Now, with Covid, she is still living her life like she wants. She is physically mobile and nearly daily visits her local Walmart and other retail stores she can walk to. I have tried so hard to get her to limit these visits, but she goes anyway. She can't get into the stores w/o a mask, so there's that, but she is very social and will talk to anyone who lets her. Social distancing is up to whoever is standing next to her. Taking care about touching surfaces is beyond her. Before Covid, I had been taking her shopping for groceries, etc. Now w/Covid, I shop every 2 wks, which is the only time I leave my house. I can't get her to acknowledge that her roamings expose her to the virus and then can expose me when she gets into my car and sits 2 ft away from me. So I have refused to take her. This is difficult for her because grocery bags are heavy and the stores are not nearby. So I feel guilty. At the same time, I know I am right not to expose myself to someone who is so careless. I have not seen my children or grandchildren for 5 mos. because of this virus. This has been heartbreaking for me. I know she has memory problems, but I have talked to her about this virus every day for months. I've even written it all down. Because of other recent issues, I know she realizes Covid is deadly, but she won't change her lifestyle. She is actually making a conscious choice, not one of obliviousness. I have Meals on Wheels delivering food, so I know she has food. I take care of all her bills etc. So she is pretty carefree and has plenty of time on her hands to go roaming. I hate to ask someone to take her shopping knowing her lifestyle is doubtful. I am at my wit's end.

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My answer may not be what you’d like, but how about accepting her need to go out and be social and shop? She’s been told the risks and chooses to go out and not distance. Other people can distance from her, she’s certainly not the only one out who doesn’t respect boundaries. She can handle the bags of her purchases, on some level it brings her joy, so let it be. If you want to keep distance that’s your choice, let her have her choices also. If she were to get CV, that’s not your fault either
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She has been fine so far. I wouldn't worry about her.

If you need to keep away for your own peace of mind then you need to stay away.

She is managing and quite frankly, when our number is up it doesn't matter where we are, we are gone.
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Leave her be and stop controlling her. My almost 96 year old mother goes grocery shopping with her mask. I can’t stop her.
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Bolero (((hugs))). I think you are doing what is in your power to do. Warning your sister of the dangers, setting up practical help like meals on wheels & minimising your own risk by reducing contact with her & others. You've done all you can.
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I have a similar situation with my 88 year old mother-in-law. We almost had to fight with her to stop her from hopping on a bus to visit my relatives in Florida because she had enough of being quarantined. At the time, she would have had to quarantine for 2 weeks in Florida. She goes out almost daily. She goes to a nearby Panera for soup and to grocery stores within walking distance. We are fortunate that she wears a mask even though she doesn't want to. My husband and I work in environments which are high risk and we try to minimize exposure but she doesn't seem to get it or doesn't care (she is typically selfish). She had meals on wheels but either stopped it or they stopped the service, not really sure what happened there. I pray daily that she doesn't get exposed to COVID.
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