He is incontinent and refuses to wear under garments. He won't even wear underwear. He just goes in his jeans. If it is urine he won't even change. He says it will dry off. If it is feces he will change but gets it all over. We have asked him to help us by at least wearing underwear & he refuses. Any suggestions?
You should NOT have to live under those conditions. PERIOD, end of sentence.
Therefore, you should apply for Medicaid for him, and put him in a facility, then go on to live the rest of your life in peace.
Or, you can report him to APS and tell then you aren't his PoA and that he's won't cooperate with the care you are trying to provide for him. They will hopefully remove him from your home and get him a court-assigned legal guardian. You will be allowed to stay in your house.
Other resources:
Social services for your county
Your local Area Agency on Aging
Your local Senior Center
Call 2-1-1 to be directed to appropriate resources
Explore Care.com if you need to hire in-home aids.
He is beyond your expertise in caregiving because it’s not only physical help he needs but medical and psychological. This cannot be handled at home. He needs a full medical and psychological evaluation, then he proceeds to care in whatever facility is recommended by his medical team.
I’m sorry, this is awful, but at least he had a choice to drink or not drink. He chose to drink. YOU choose not to participate now. You’re through. Don’t let him drag you down with him, and good luck as you move forward with your life.
I am sure you know all this but thought I would post the info for the forum. I just read that WE is treatable by replacing the thiamine the alcohol has deplited. But you need to stop drinking for it to work. By the time it gets to KS there is nothing that can be done.