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When I said no last night he suddenly flipped our dining room table over with everything on it and told me I should be glad that it wasn’t me!!! Is it time to find a place for him? His memory loss is bad. He has had testing and his executive functions have declined in 6 months time. The VA took away his drivers license after road test. A second time in six months!!! Anybody have any thoughts? I am numb right now. I have alerted his doctor at the VA and awaiting some kind of help.

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You are not safe. He must be placed for your personal safety.

You can call 911 when he gets violent and the police/ambulance can take him to the hospital.
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My gosh! This isn’t healthy for you, nor is it safe!

It certainly isn’t affection. You know that. You must be horribly disturbed by this. I am so sorry. You absolutely did the right thing by calling his doctor.

Honestly, I wouldn’t want to be alone with him right now. Do you suspect a UTI or another medical issue that is causing an outburst like this?

Is this an isolated incident or has it happened before. Please be completely honest with his doctor. They hear all kinds of situations and will know how to handle it.

Best wishes to you. Hugs! Be careful, please. Can you call someone to be with you? You really shouldn’t be alone with him. Could happen again and the outcome may not be a table. It could be you that he goes after if his frustration level becomes high enough.
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Takincare Oct 2019
Or even worse, he won't take no for an answer AND she becomes the table.
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Iinappropriate Sexual Behavior ISB is common with dementia, unfortunately, and can be treated with medication. I think Tothill is right and you aren't safe. If you call 911 at his next outburst, the hospital can help immediately with meds and even possible placement for him.

I am so sorry you are going thru this. Best of luck and keep us updated
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If he has been classified as 100% through the VA then he should be eligible for one of the VA facilities. I would contact his Primary at the VA (or CBOC) and discuss the increased outburst and the anger.
I would also tell them that it is getting to the point where you do not feel safe in the house when he gets angry.

Talk to a Social Worker or talk to a Patient Advocate if you have problems connecting with the doctor.
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My husband was diagnosed with "borderline" cognitive impairment in June and returns to the neuro in December for another evaluation. Anger and nastiness was one of his first symptoms along with short term memory loss and lack of focus. Even before the PCP sent him to the neuro, he gave him a low dose prescription for Lexapro for the anger and nastiness. It worked amazingly well. Lexapro can also lessen the libido. Just sharing my experience. I know how awful the anger can be and I hope it gets better for you.
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Yes, it is time. He will be safer, and you will be safer. Bless you,
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Yes do it, before he hurts you.
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Dear Flamingo, please make arrangements for yourself to be safe. Secure a place that you can flee to in a moment, if necessary. Most certainly, I wud report the incident to the police... (cuz paperwork is king). Nothing against your husb, but he cud easily assault u next time. He has to be medicated for u to be safe, cuz he's violent. Please don't waste time protecting yourself.
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DareDiffer Oct 2019
Definitely agree with Tiger - please act now
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Hi there,
At this point, you need to take care of yourself! This may sound mean and heartless, but you need to find him a suitable place and visit him! The staff can communicate with his doctor and give the doctor info that may help him/her prescribe meds to help! Good luck and God bless you!
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I agree with everyone else. You need to be safe. Call 911 and let them know what is going on. He needs to go to the hospital and from their he can be placed into a facility.
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This is hard and the anger and meanness is the worse. I finally told my doctor to put him on Seraquel and the next day he was so much calmer. It is still a lot of work but now we can enjoy each other.
Blessings to you
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What type of dementia does he have? bvFTD has the symptoms you describe (hypersexuality and anger outbursts with violence) and the medications given for ALZ can cause opposite/bad reactions for people with FTD type dementia. You must keep yourself safe, but also others, if he will treat you this way he absolutely will do it/has done it to others and the last thing you want is for him to hurt someone and then he will go to jail. And yes, you may eventually get him out, but it will not be cheap or easy. And since you knew about what he was doing and did not try to put him in a safe place, it is doubtful they will trust you to take care of him anymore. So, yes, it is past time for a change in his living situation.
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Talk to his doctor about medication to control his anger and hypersexuality.  If you feel unsafe, you need to place him.  I'm sorry.
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