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When I said no last night he suddenly flipped our dining room table over with everything on it and told me I should be glad that it wasn’t me!!! Is it time to find a place for him? His memory loss is bad. He has had testing and his executive functions have declined in 6 months time. The VA took away his drivers license after road test. A second time in six months!!! Anybody have any thoughts? I am numb right now. I have alerted his doctor at the VA and awaiting some kind of help.

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You are not safe. He must be placed for your personal safety.

You can call 911 when he gets violent and the police/ambulance can take him to the hospital.
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Reply to Tothill
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Iinappropriate Sexual Behavior ISB is common with dementia, unfortunately, and can be treated with medication. I think Tothill is right and you aren't safe. If you call 911 at his next outburst, the hospital can help immediately with meds and even possible placement for him.

I am so sorry you are going thru this. Best of luck and keep us updated
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Reply to lealonnie1
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My husband was diagnosed with "borderline" cognitive impairment in June and returns to the neuro in December for another evaluation. Anger and nastiness was one of his first symptoms along with short term memory loss and lack of focus. Even before the PCP sent him to the neuro, he gave him a low dose prescription for Lexapro for the anger and nastiness. It worked amazingly well. Lexapro can also lessen the libido. Just sharing my experience. I know how awful the anger can be and I hope it gets better for you.
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Reply to Monica19815
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If he has been classified as 100% through the VA then he should be eligible for one of the VA facilities. I would contact his Primary at the VA (or CBOC) and discuss the increased outburst and the anger.
I would also tell them that it is getting to the point where you do not feel safe in the house when he gets angry.

Talk to a Social Worker or talk to a Patient Advocate if you have problems connecting with the doctor.
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Reply to Grandma1954
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Dear Flamingo, please make arrangements for yourself to be safe. Secure a place that you can flee to in a moment, if necessary. Most certainly, I wud report the incident to the police... (cuz paperwork is king). Nothing against your husb, but he cud easily assault u next time. He has to be medicated for u to be safe, cuz he's violent. Please don't waste time protecting yourself.
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DareDiffer Oct 24, 2019
Definitely agree with Tiger - please act now
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Yes do it, before he hurts you.
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Reply to DollyMe
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I agree with everyone else. You need to be safe. Call 911 and let them know what is going on. He needs to go to the hospital and from their he can be placed into a facility.
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Reply to elaine1962
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This is hard and the anger and meanness is the worse. I finally told my doctor to put him on Seraquel and the next day he was so much calmer. It is still a lot of work but now we can enjoy each other.
Blessings to you
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Reply to Eloise1943
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My gosh! This isn’t healthy for you, nor is it safe!

It certainly isn’t affection. You know that. You must be horribly disturbed by this. I am so sorry. You absolutely did the right thing by calling his doctor.

Honestly, I wouldn’t want to be alone with him right now. Do you suspect a UTI or another medical issue that is causing an outburst like this?

Is this an isolated incident or has it happened before. Please be completely honest with his doctor. They hear all kinds of situations and will know how to handle it.

Best wishes to you. Hugs! Be careful, please. Can you call someone to be with you? You really shouldn’t be alone with him. Could happen again and the outcome may not be a table. It could be you that he goes after if his frustration level becomes high enough.
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Reply to NeedHelpWithMom
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Takincare Oct 24, 2019
Or even worse, he won't take no for an answer AND she becomes the table.
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Yes, it is time. He will be safer, and you will be safer. Bless you,
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Reply to inkandpaper
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