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Home costs 6,500 a month. My mom is still living in their home. We will eventually have to sell if we can’t get assistance. Advice?

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Did you consult with an Eldercare attorney before placement?

Medicaid will, in some states, pay for Assisted Living after a year or two of private pay. There are also Medicaid regs that prevent the "community spouse" (your mom) from becoming bankrupt or impoverished.

I also found this link:

https://rrb.gov/Benefits/RB-5/nursing_home
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You need to protect Mom. Medicaid allows for a Community Spouse. Now just giving you the basics. Your parents assets will be split. With my GFs parents they had 60k in savings. He needed NH care so 30k went to his care, she kept 30k. When his 30k got spent down, the wife applied for Medicaid. Not sure how the pension would be split, but my friends mother was not made impoverished. She was able to stay in the home and have a car.

Find a lawyer well versed in Medicaid.

If Dad is a Vet who served during wartime, he may be able to get Aid and Attendance. Even if he didn't serve during wartime, Vets have some benefits. You should have a County Veterans Office so call them.
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You'd have to refer to your father's retirement advisor; we on an internet forum would have no way to know if they'd offer him financial assistance for AL or not! I would think if he gets a monthly $$ amount, it can be used however he sees fit. If he was in active wartime military service, he may qualify for Veterans Aid & Attendance which you'd have to apply for thru the VA directly.

Good luck!
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