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Can my Ex BIL, current POA to ex husb block my visits? State of ME. Me and Ex have a good relationship, in fact I took care of him after divorce until his health rapidly declined. We have 2 adult kids w/ special needs. They need my help and guidance thru this, I'm legal guardian to one kid. What can I do? Tyvm

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If he’s in a hospital call Alliance for better Long Term Care. It worked for me here in RI. Don’t know if they have something similar where you live
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Reply to Jada824
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My children can see him but it's uneasy as they dont comprehend the situation and the Staff has been inappropriate with their behavior. We could hear a supervisor on the phone saying " that's the daughter calling, she talks funny...."
My ex wants to see me, last thing he said in person was " I dont want my brother fighting w my best friend"
But he's too afraid to speak up. It's a sad, sad situation. We divorced '12. He got sick '16. I was heath proxy and poa until 12/23 when he needed surgery and more intense care. I made the hospital reach out to the brother who was ignoring the whole situation. Frankly I think he's pissed he had to get involved. Im out of ideas, BIL won't talk to me even tho I helped 100% with all care related info. He's a real jerk, sadly
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Reply to Kenz59
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SamTheManager Feb 4, 2026
I would ignore statements like that from the staff, they sound ignorant but that's not something you can do much about. Your real concern lies with the BIL. You might have to just suck it up and be very nice and apologetic towards him, because he is the gatekeeper to your ex. Doesn't mean you are wrong about any of it, but you have no real power in the situation.
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Sorry Ken, but if an elder care attorney has no helpful ideas for you, I cannot imagine anyone will. Have you tried speaking politely to the BIL and telling him he can be there when you visit?

Best of luck with a difficult situation.
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Reply to lealonnie1
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Is your ex able to speak for himself? If so, that overrides POA. POA is basically for financial matters. IMO, the only way they can block anyone is if they feel the person is a threat or will upset the person.
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Reply to JoAnn29
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The person with the power of attorney can block your visits. Are your children also being denied visits with their father?

Is there someone else related to your ex-spouse whom you could speak to and who might be willing to intercede with your ex-brother-in-law to request that you be allowed a visit with your ex-spouse?
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Reply to Rosered6
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Jada824 23 hours ago
POA cannot block visits unless it would be harmful to patient. They have to act in the elders best interest and h tge ex wants to see the OP
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I did, she did not have an answer.
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Reply to Kenz59
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See a family law attorney.
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