My 94 yr old dad hasn't been taken to a specialist for dementia. Sister has told me he has it. Should I believe her?

My mom was never seen by any specialist concerning her dementia but I am 100% certain she has it, sometimes it is obvious and sometimes those closest to someone can see what an intermittent visitor can not.

Having dementia does NOT prevent a person from making or changing a will. What is important is whether the person could understand what he was signing.

So all this discussion of who can make the diagnosis and whether it has to be in the person's medical record, etc. is not relevant.

Here is an article about this by AC's legal expert: https://www.agingcare.com/articles/elder-cant-sign-will-trust-power-of-attorney-153521.htm

The lawyer who helped with the will several years ago apparently was satisfied that Dad did understand what he was signing. I think your sister would have a very hard time contesting it.

Maybe it's me, but if he lives with Older sister( and I don't know if he does) she is probably seeing things that point her in that direction. My mom pretty well hid my dad;s condition from us.. yes she made comments,, but laughed them off. We see this all the time on here.. no one believes the caregiver! If you want a definite diagnosis.. you may need a neurologist.. but really.. a lot of know the truth with out that. When my Mom ended up in the ICU and I had to rush home..I knew right away that Dad had a real problem.. the follow up at the Dr just confirmed what we already knew. MAybe your sister is correct.

I suppose a general physician could, if that primary doctor had the necessary experience with dementia but I would expect a Neurologist to be involved in a formal diagnosis. As I understand it there are specific tests that need to be done to determine what type or stage of dementia someone has.

Why do you think your sister is lying to you? Does she have a reputation for doing that?

If you want our help, we need to have more details about what has gone on, (in whole words, please). We don’t need very personal details, but we need more than you've given us. A primary doctor could make a preliminary diagnoses but tests and a definitive diagnoses and treatment plan would probably need to come from a neurologist. 

Many elder people have some degree of dementia, and to the best of my knowledge,  the "diagnosis" is somewhat subjective. It's not a death sentence, and it does not mean they are incompetent to make decisions. It comes and goes. My sister and I have gone through this and what she meant was "he can't be trusted/believed", and therefore, if he told me something and I acted on it, it was invalid. My advice is to get smart on the facts of dementia, and to try as much as you can to work with your sister.

So, to be clear: You have been your parents' caregiver for ten years; your sister was their caregiver before you. Five years ago they made a will making you their only heir. Your sister claims that their primary care doctor told her that they had dementia when they were in her care --- over ten years ago --- so the will is invalid. There is no written diagnosis of dementia in their medical records. Do I have that right? It might be easier to answer you if you could clarify the timeline.

Yes, and please use complete words and sentences. Thanks.

My sister was the caregiver for both my parents for five yrs. During those 5 yrs she says the doctrs told her both of thm had dementia my father being 84 and my mother being 79at tht time.my sister was caught doing some things wrong with their finances while she their caregiver. So my other 8 siblings told her nomore taking of my our parents so since i live right next door we all thght well i should take over their care 5 yrs later they made a will tht says im to b the only heir. Its not much but being the home we all grew up in. I guess they all think its my right too b their caregiver n thm not willing to help at all anyways my. Sister which was their caregiver bac thn is saying tht nothing is mine because they did tht will ohh n POW whn both my parents were diagnosed with dementia whn she was the caregiver butshe nvr told no one they were diagnosed til now tht she knws tht my parents have done a will. I did ask her why she nvever stold anyone of us as to us we never noticed any thing wrong w both my parents until 1yr ago we noticed dementia on my father as for my mother maybe early stages. and i said to her tht who had diagnosed thm both n she said their primary doctor but there is nothing on their records of any specialist diagnosing both of them. Is the will n POW valid or the diagonis frm a doctor k

You say that there's nothing on their records of any specialist diagnosing them with dementia. Is there anything on their records showing that their *primary care doctor* believes one or both of them had dementia? If so, *at what date* did he document that conclusion?