My mother is sneaky and refuses to listen to anything me or my siblings say. She calls us crooks and tells everyone she comes in contact with how terrible her children are. The housekeeper stops in anytime she needs money and “pulls weeds” so she can get some cash. Mother is constantly writing her checks and handing her cash. Mothers bank accounts are dwindling. Bank and rehab personnel have warned us about red flags with housekeeper but we can’t make mother see it. We have involved DCFS but since mother loves the housekeeper and mother is not confused, there’s not much they can do. How do we protect her when she won’t let us?
Does she have a POA on file? If not, and mom is still mentally competent, you may want to get the medical and financial POA in place now. It sounds like she will eventually need someone to advocate for her best interests to make sure she is not a victim of elder abuse.
An elder law attorney would be a good resource as well to find out what you can do to protect your mom. Most offer a first initial consultation for free.
She refuses to name a POA because she doesn’t trust anyone. She says she has her right mind (and she does) so she doesn’t want anyone writing her bills or handling her business. That’s part of the problem we are facing.