What to write on a Mother's Day card to a Mom who has dementia with delusions?

You're overthinking. I grew up with two AWFUL parents and the mothers day and father day cards were so glurgey and sentimental I wanted to vomit. But buy a card we must, right? I would buy blank cards and write 'Happy ___ with love from Lassie' on the inside. A card won't mean much to her deteriorating brain, get a card with a picture of a bird, a dog, a cat, a flower, whatever she used to be into. Write "thinking of you with love on mothers day, love from Momsgirl" inside. The end. People make things so complicated. You'll never get a loving mother with a functioning mind back no matter what you send.

Also............"with love, not live." I need to go back to bed

I am sure I am not alone in absolutely HATING the fake "holiday" that is Mother's Day. I love being a mom, I love my kids, they love me. End of story--right? Nope, all my growing up life was the BAM of my mother's bedroom door on Mother's Day morning and her unbearable behavior all day---we were reminded that we'd all ruined her life, we were the source of all her anxieties and we had taken all the joy out of her existence. So--yes, I do get my mom a card and a small gift but I often drop it off at her place when I KNOW she won't be there.

The mom you knew is gone. What this person she's become thinks of you is not really important. I am not on good terms with my mother this mother's day, but I will still get a card. She needs to have these to display at her apartment...and I need to get over the fact she had problems and hated being a mother. Mother's Day is a fake holiday. Remember that. Just sign the card and mail it. Do something fun for yourself on Sunday.

My mother also is starting with these symptoms. It's not your mother, it's the disease. It makes them somewhat nasty and suspicious as well as paranoid. Remember her the way she was when healthy. She cannot help it. Try to see her through this part of her life because, it will be over soon and you will find comfort and satisfaction in having been there.

Definitely no references to the current rift. Poor dear. This cruel disease has robbed her of good feelings about her only daughter.

As the others have said, just address her as she was before the dementia changed her. What would you have written then?

Thank you all for your responses. The overriding theme that you all suggested was to "keep it simple". I guess I was overthinking. The card is in the mail.

From dolphingirl11,Dear Momgirl1, Your mom's illness steals away the mom you once knew.Her personality may of changed,but not face,her heart and the arms that once held you.Because her mind changed to the point that she thinks differently,you need to communicate differently as well.When you are ready to prepare a Mother's Day card,instead of using loving words....use loving pictures. Whether you draw these pictures or use stickers,it illustrates how you feel and what her mom's day gift is.Also,include a photo of you and her,as suggested by Sunnygirl1.Plan a wonderful evening of music,gifts,and a hot dinner.Take a walk in a park and enjoy the nature.If you live by some kind of body of water,like an ocean or lake,sit and watch the waves and the birds.Very peaceful.When you're ready to talk to your mom,keep your words sweet and meaningful.If she becomes difficult,don't fight with her...look at her with a smile and attempt to hug her.Try to be the controller of the mood of the day.Perhaps she will settle her wild ways and smile back.I wish you good luck with the Mother's Day card you give her and your loving day with the only mom you get in your lifetime.Have a great day.M🐬

Simply write "With live, your daughter (name).
So many times, those with dementia accuse the ones they love of stealing. It's never "I can't find it or I miss places it." Someone stole it. This is her disease talking. I know it's hard to not take it personal, but try. Hopefully she will get pasted this phase of her disease and move on to something else. This to shall pass

I would try to look beyond the accusations and unkind words. Somewhere deep inside there is your mother, who love you. So, I would give with that sentiment. I would select a card that has something colorful and that she might like,, such as flowers, cats, dogs or butterflies. You might include a photo of when you were a child. Perhaps, someone at the facility will help her hang the card near her bed so she can enjoy it.

Oh, I think I would write something from the heart. My cousin has a decorative sign that I placed in her room at the Memory Care unit where she stays. It says, "Never Forget That You Are Love." I know she doesn't read it anymore, but it means a lot to me to know that it's there.