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He has been the sole provider in the marriage for the whole marriage. She has took care of him before he entered the nursing. And before even him in the nursing home she has always did what he had asked.she is his power of attorney. But recently my brother in law has claimed to be his power of attorney but will not show her anything stating that. So can my father in law legally take away the money to pay the bills that aquired together before he went in to the nursing home and her money for food, shelter,etc. Also can my father in law change his power of attorney with out legally notifing her?

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In a community-property state, the joint assets are usually defined as those acquired over the marriage, in your case 16 years. Typically, spouses are also entitled to pension that was gained then.

She sounds like she needs a family-law or divorce attorney to straighten out who's is what, and get some order put in so she is not put out on the street.

Whatever assets he had prior to the marriage have always remained his, and if the son or whoever this is wants to take charge, there is little she can do with that part of it.

But she's entitled to her half of their joint earnings, no matter who earned them, for the past 16 years.
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If your father in law is competent, yes, he can change his POA.

The VA should be able to provide proof that he is the POA of record by producing a copy.

I would contact a certified elder law attorney, www.nelf.org is where you would find one in your area.

Leaving your mom destitute is not legal, she needs an attorney to help her sort out what her marital rights are.

Please do not go by what an anonymous forum has to offer. Find her an attorney pronto and get her protected.
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To clarify who is the PoA would be important and probably the easier thing to start with because she doesn't need to pay an attorney for this. She should bring her own PoA document to the VA and then verify that there is no other/new/different paperwork submitted by her husband and/or the BIL. No, FIL doesn't have to tell her. It would be important for her to know if he has ever had a cognitive/memory test result that is in his medical records. If he's impaired then any new PoA he created may be contested. If she is his Medical Representative then the VA will provide this info without having to get his permission.
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Isthisrealyreal Nov 2021
Geaton, this isn't just about POA. She needs an attorney because the stepson has cleaned out their joint account and she doesn't have any money to pay bills.

This isn't a DIY.
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It really doesn't matter who has POA, she is entitled to being cared for. She is ur FILs wife and entitled to her share. Even Medicaid allows for splitting of assets so the Community spouse is cared for.
Does she receive Social Security? If they share a joint account, then she needs to open one of her own and contact SS to reroute her money.

I don't understand why people won't provide proof of POA. It would make things so much easier for everyone involved. If FIL did change POA, MIL should have been made aware of the change in a letter saying her POA is revoked, IMO. If FIL has been found incompetent, no POA can be assigned or revoked.

I agree, you need a lawyer.
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