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My mother in law suffers with dementia. She hallucinates, is violent and talks out of her head. She accuses us of taking things from her which we haven’t taken anything from her. She hides things and will just start stripping her clothes off. It is too much for us. The only facility that will take her with her Medicare has her on a waiting list. We are trying to get her on Medicaid and have a hospice nurse and doctor seeing her but there are certain guidelines so their hands are tied. We have had to call 911 on several occasions because she has just gone crazy. I know that isn’t right to say but she gets so uncontrollable. The hospital checks her out and just sends her home. I know they have certain guidelines as well but we feel someone has got to do something, it’s too much for us! We are not trained for this. We feel so bad feeling like this but we do!

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Home care of persons with dementia is difficult. Reason one, is that family members are not trained caregivers. Reason two, the home is not designed with the security features required to house irrational people with dementia.
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Sounds like your longer term plans are in progress but emergency response is needed - like now! Like an asthma plan, but for severe paranoia etc

Has MIL's Doctor given you any such action plan or medication that may help in time of crises?

I am not a fan of over medicating for mental health/dementia crises but sometimes to maintain safety it is needed.
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The next time you have to call 911, and they want to send her back home, you tell them that she CANNOT return home as she is not safe to herself or others. And stick to your guns as they will try and talk you into taking her back. They(the hospital)will then have to find some place to place her in, and it will be on them and not you.
I wish you the very best in this very difficult situation.
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