I read "living at home" as in their own home, vs living with me (the caregiver). And yes, the answer really depends, I think if the surgery is serious enough that you are fearful of the outcome and/or there is no other family to be with her then of course you need to be there for her. If, on the other hand, you expect a long convalescence and she has other family with her then you may want to visit later. Oh, I also wonder who her POA is, and whether anyone has given any thought that she may lose ability to return home following the surgery.... there really are just too many possibilities to give you a good answer.
Debbie, please clarify... your profile says that your Mother lives with you? May I ask what type of surgery is your mother having? How old is your Mother, and what are her medical issues? Does she have memory problems? Will she be going into Rehab? Is your Mom here in the States? Or outside the U.S.?
It does not have to be you, but you can send someone.
And yes, the answer really depends, I think if the surgery is serious enough that you are fearful of the outcome and/or there is no other family to be with her then of course you need to be there for her. If, on the other hand, you expect a long convalescence and she has other family with her then you may want to visit later.
Oh, I also wonder who her POA is, and whether anyone has given any thought that she may lose ability to return home following the surgery.... there really are just too many possibilities to give you a good answer.