Why is my mother constantly calling me because she is worried?

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My mother recently fell and fractured her hip. She has home care nursing 24/7. She doesnt feel alright with just them in the house even though they are educated and trained and know what they are doing, she has a bad feeling. i am tired of her paranoid nonsense.Unless she is sick or really needs my help with something I cant talk to her anymore. She doesnt think anyone except her knows antyhting at all anyway. Only she can have any knowledge about anything. Is it normal for someone to be paranoid or having a bad feeling as a result of a hip fracture? She has always been this way, but now it is more so.

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Kelly, she has definitely stopped taking the tramadol at all, has she? Because side effects from opiates was going to be my first question - you do get some weird behaviours, especially in older people whose bodies don't metabolise them very well.
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Count your blessings. She can still dial a telephone number and call you. You are financially blessed to afford the 24x7 care. Learn the skills of validation and distraction, and use them go handle the minor complaints you are dealing with. If it is progressive dementia, the adverse behaviors will get so bad, that you will wish you had "the good old days" back.
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Kelly most Elderly People do not like having Strangers in the house, and Your Mom is bound to be nervous because of the fall.
As You stated Your Mom is receiving 24 hour Nursing Care at home but remember She would give it all away for quality time with You Who She trusts and Loves. I treasure the beautiful memories I have of My dear Mother, and the time We had together over the last three years at home.
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I went through the same experience with my mother. She even wanted someone she knew to stay over night in her room, every night. This went on for 8 months. All of us who knew and loved her were worn pretty thin before she passed away. Of course now we all wish we could spend another evening with her. The only advice I can offer is to do what you can do. These are hard times. Love and prayers.
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With all due respect, Ferris 1 is right in your opinion. But, not all people, seniors, situations or caregivers are alike. Kellyd really didn't provide enough information to make a solid conclusion. And, not everyone can afford Assisted Living. Further, assisted living is not skilled nursing, or sub-acute care for the post-op patient. A medical assessment and more information with an open mind with compassion are needed. Just put yourself in the senior's place. Would you like to suddenly be dependent, hurting, confused, scared, and be dumped? Not to say that seniors cannot try the patience of a saint, but if what we really want is their well being (versus our convenience), then we need to do the leg work to figure out what is best for them, not just ourselves. Placement is only one part of care.
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Ferris 1 is right. Her personality is still there and just exacerbated. She is trying to regain control by using other people to her wishes. When my mother and aunt found themselves housebound due to my dad's death, my brother and I arranged for some meals on wheels and backed off for a couple of weeks so that they could see their new reality. In order to get out they would need bus or taxi. When we returned, we started taking them out to visit assisted facilities and asked them to move out and try it for for about 6 months. They never returned home which was then sold to offset their rent.
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How old is your mom? Anesthesia and trauma sometimes catapults dementia. Loss of independence can make them crabbier than usual (wouldn't you be?). My mom was difficult insisting she didn't need aides, gave me a very hard time, constant calls. As time went on it increased. She complained about not being comfortable with the aide. As it turned out, the aide that made like she was so good in front of me was actually abusive to my mom. If there is a cognitive issue, or a fear issue, your mom may not be identifying why she feels uncomfortable and therefore not telling you the real underlying reason. Not to say I think all aides are abusive, certainly not, but you would be surprised at how often they can be domineering or controlling, or not attentive, and how often abuse can happen. I went with very reputable agencies and one aide that mom was not comfortable with actually beat her landing mom in the hospital. I thought it could happen only once, but wanted to be safe so I installed cameras. Guess what?? Even with a new agency and new aides, I caught an aide on camera unlawfully restraining my mother (just to be mean and show her who was boss). As for the medications, anger sometimes covers sadness and depression. Ativan (the Benzos) can be dangerous in the elderly if given on a regular basis. Talk to her doc about anti-depressants, lexapro is good for depression and anxiety - it mellowed my mom without zonking her out. There are other anti-depressants, as well. I know it can be tough and all you want to do is ditch and run, but if you take a step back and try to figure out what iss really going on - maybe talk to your mom about her feelings of crabbiness and don't just stop with the complaints, try to drill down, or have someone else she likes to talk to inquire, you might find out more information on what she is really feeling. It is far to easy for us to fall into the old family dynamics without realizing what is really going on! You'll both be happier for it in the long run.
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She's probably taking pain meds which have nasty side effects. If you have MPOA, talk with her doctor about other alternatives. If she has been know-it-all most of your life, then she will remain like that. Tell her your concerns and then do not respond to her phone calls unless one of the aides calls you. You'll be under her thumb unless you put a stop to it. Time to act like an adult instead of the "child" your mother sees. Few parents allow their children to become adults.
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Not sure why you say she doesn't have dementia. I'll bet a detailed neuro-cognitive assessment would show that she does. But she won't go for that.

My late MIL was just like this. Previously dxed with dementia by a neurologist ( she told her children that was BS and not to believe it), her symptoms worsened after surgery. Wouldn't cooperate with rehab. Was placed in a NH and starved herself to death. Nope, no one could tell her what to do. Not her sons ( she accused them of elder abuse when they tried to get her to stop smoking, eat better), not her doctors.

She knew better. I'm really sorry, but this is a personality type that i call " their own worst enemy".
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Kelly, getting old isn't easy for many elders. Think about it, Mom can't get around because of a broken hip which will take time to heal and all the physical therapy involved... Mom can't just hop in the car to go shopping or to the hair dresser or to visit friends.... depending on Mom's age, if she is much older, then most of her good friends have either moved away or have passed on. Elders become bored because they can't do our favor things.

Hearing becoming worse, eyesight is starting to fail, clothes don't fix correctly, can't wear high heels anymore due to being a fall risk. Thus when it comes to conversations, there isn't a heck of a lot to talk about as not much is new in their lives.... [sigh].

I am afraid to ask this, but how does Mom feels about moving to a retirement community where she would be around people closer to her age? Should I cover my ears???

Is aging a denial? Thus the reason for not wanting to take any medicine? I know I was the same, wouldn't take an aspirin for pain unless my hair was on fire. And you can't change that way of thinking. Some meds can be compound into a liquid that the caregiver could put in her orange juice or coffee. It's just a suggestion.
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