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My 86 year old mother and I live in a two story garden home. This arrangement seems to work most of the time until she wants something and yells at me for a response and cannot hear me when I yell back unless I'm practically "in her face" and then asks me why I am yelling at her. It sounds laughable, but really is most annoying. Sometimes I just pretend I don't hear her.

When suggesting a hearing aid, she says that they don't work, too expensive, unsightly. So what, I ask is the solution?

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Husband has them and they are invisible when he wears them and I stress when. They cost $4000 and constantly need new batteries and frquent adjustment. They are very snsitive and often make unwelcome noises. refusing to use them seems to be a common problem and modern ones are so tiny they are easy to loose. it does help to speak clearly and look at deaf people when talking.
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My mom had hearing aids and never wore them. My dad had them ($6k ones) and only wore them when I wouldn't talk to him unless he put them in. Now my mom just says "Huh" a lot. I've learned to wait for a couple of beats and she'll figure out what I said and answer. It IS frustrating. I also have learned to speak more s-l-o-w-l-y and L-O-U-D-L-Y and I just wish medical personnel would pick up on that too. Even when they can tell my mom can't hear well, they don't speak up or slow down. So I have to "translate", which gives me the giggles sometimes. :)
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My mom is very hard of hearing, even with the aids. 'What????" is a running joke in our family.....sorry, couldn't resist. ;)
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What?????
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Yes, I have heard exactly the same thing about any hearing aid. Doesn't work all the time, background noise, too many visits to Beltone for repair, etc. I just wanted someone who had one to verify all this so now I know NOT to waste my time and money on one for her. Good thing I have a strong voice so I can yell back!!!! Thank you for your imput!!
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My dad was deaf in one ear and very hard of hearing in his other ear. I know exactly the situation you described as my dad would holler at me from the next room and then not hear me when I answered back.

I never heard my dad complain that his hearing aide was unsightly but I do know it was very expensive and I don't recall it being covered by insurance (although maybe it was). He also had problems with it regularly and I'd have to take him to Beltone and have them fix it. And once he had the hearing aide he was bothered by other noise as the hearing aide was very sensitive. When the battery was running low (which seemed to be all the time) the thing would squeal and whine to the point where I could hear it. And as he aged he couldn't change the battery himself which was fine when he lived with me as I was right there but not so good when he went into a NH as he had a difficult time finding a staff member who would change it for him. He also began to lose it, it went through the wash and we made the decision not to buy him another one as he would have lost that one too and, as I said, it was very expensive. We got used to yelling.
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My mother always refused hearing aids because "they don't look nice". Even if you got it for her she likely would refuse to wear it.
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